02| 𝕷𝖎𝖙𝖙𝖑𝖊 𝖉𝖎𝖉 𝕴 𝖐𝖓𝖔𝖜

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That night, I analyzed the patterns on my room ceiling like never before, like they'd been stranger to me all along

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That night, I analyzed the patterns on my room ceiling like never before, like they'd been stranger to me all along. The curls, the swirls, the delicately laced designs—had I ever really seen any of it before? I don't know.

Sleep was stranger to me, even when I invited it in like a long-lost friend. But it refused any connection to me, and I craved for the solace that came with it through the night and right up to the first few rays of the sun peeking out. I tossed and turned in relentless motions, my bones weary for rest and my heart an instability in my ribcage, my chest a mound of disturbances.

They say eyes are the window to the soul, but that night, how I wished you'd just shut the damn curtains.

And truthfully so, I had no idea this was just the first night of many more to come.

There were times in my life I absolutely despised Amani's energy. We were like two ends of a spectrum—at times when hers was full to the brim, oozing out of her, mine resembled a barren desert. Dry and flaky. And today, to my luck, was another day where I resided on the drier end of it.

"You had a nice night," I guessed as I slid into the only other chair on our kitchen table. Amani was at the stove, stirring a spoon in a pot.

"He was a gentleman. He was perfect. Beauti—"

"We get the point," I held up a hand. "I don't need you to vomit a whole thesaurus on me."

"Such a drab you are," Amani grumbled, throwing her handkerchief at me. I squirmed until it landed on the floor. Her snot was not what I needed right now. "Be happy for me."

"As if it's that easy to be happy about something that gives me zero excitement." I turned in my seat. "What took you so long? I was awake for hours."

"Baby boo missed me?" Amani cooed, and I threw her snotty napkin back at her. She laughed and turned her gaze back to the simmering pot.

"You forgot to change my diaper last night. I had to sit in a puddle of my loneliness and misery the whole time."

"You cross the lines of tolerable disgust."

"I love to mirror you."

Amani turned down the flame of the stove and encircled her arms around my shoulders. The love I had for this girl bloomed tenfold.

"I love you, Jannat."

"I love me too," I smiled, and she placed a big wet and sloppy kiss on my cheek.

"Ask me how the date went," Amani squealed, as she emptied the contents of the pot into a large mug and took a seat at the table. "Come on, ask me."

I stabbed my bread with my fork. "How did the date go?"

"On a beautiful Pegasus carriage to heaven," Jannat sighed, her pea-sized eyes quite literally taking the shape of hearts. Pink, glittery and sparkly, nauseating hearts. "We had this extravagant dinner at the Halls and then rode horses through his farmhouse."

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