My Love ✔️

It'll be fine

While Jin is in the shower, I'm going through the kitchen to see what I could make to eat. I made him skip breakfast after all. He'll leave a little before Woozi arrives so we can take it easy for a while.

"I guess I'll just make some sandwiches with eggs and bacon" I mumble to myself, trying to stay calm every time I drop something on the floor. My patience seems to be very thin and I feel like it won't take much for me to explode.

I get started on breakfast and the smell soon fills the air around me, but hunger makes itself now and it's just about to evolve into hanger. I take in a deep breath and decide to eat an apple in the meantime, no way am I letting things get worse, I don't want to lash out on Jin.

But as I take a bite in the bland apple, the bacon splashes around, burning my skin multiple times, the egg breaks, now looking miserable and murdered and that's just not how I want my eggs. That seems to be the breaking point for me.

I groan and throw my spatula in the sink, but it bounces back out and falls on the floor, hitting my toes in the process and damn does it hurt. Angry tears escape my eyes and I wipe them away, only to find more following suit.

The smell of burning reaches my nose and I look up to find the bacon and eggs starting to become a tad bit too black so I hurry to get a Tupperware to transfer everything into it. It looks pitiful.

What's more pitiful though, is how I let this affect me so much. It's just making food, but right now, nothing seems to be working the way it should. As if the process of making food reflects just how bad things have been going for me.

Except, I don't need that from food. Food is supposed to be comforting, so why is it against me now?

I look at the grilled yet cold toast in the toaster. Another stupid thing that doesn't go my way. I put the plastic container on the counter but as I move away, my arm knocks it off the counter and I watch as everything spreads on the floor, bacon splattered around, the eggs a murder scene.

A sob makes its way out of my throat and I sit on the floor, just done with everything. You know what? Screw cooking, screw music, I'm done. Just... screw everything.

I hear the bathroom door open and I feel so ashamed, so I hide my head against my knees and wrap my arms around me. The feet stop at the entrance of the kitchen and I know he's currently analyzing to see what happened.

I hear a sigh and I curl up even more. He's disappointed, right? "Come here, sweetheart" I hear before arms wrap around me, making me stand up from the floor and to the living room. I don't dare look up as I feel ashamed of crying for such a small task as making food and I try to discreetly wipe my face with my sleeve.

He sits us both on the couch and then proceeds to make us lie down, me in his arms, head against his chest. He starts stroking my back in soothing motions and hums a soft little melody to calm me down.

My anger fades away, leaving me now feeling more sad and empty than anything else. I hope this pain in my chest can be gone soon too.

Seokjin's POV

Seeing her on the floor in the kitchen with food splattered on the ground next to her tugs at my heart. She looks so vulnerable and I don't like seeing her this way. So when I take her to the couch, when I make us lie down, when I feel her body shake in my arms, my heart hurts for her. Just how much more must it hurt for her.

And it hurts that I don't know how to make things better, that only time can take care of her pain. I hope that at least, getting her music back can make her feel better.