Wings of Gods and Many Men // Dream SMP // Tommyinnit

Like Real People Do

Ash.

It flowed in the air, circulating each breath, moving with each breathless intake, filling the skies as if it were cloudy blue. Ash. Everything was ash. Even after the dust of battle settled, even as those who betrayed them retreated in crumbling victory, even as the withers remained attacking anyone unfortunate enough to be near them, the ash remained thick in the air. It was suffocating. It was as suffocating as the time spent working to reclaim this home as their own. It was as suffocating being thrown out. It was as suffocating as exile.

Yet something about this ash was so much worse. It was worse because it was unrepairable. There was nothing salvageable about this level of suffocation, everything either exploded or was left burned from the fiery rubble. There was no bouncing back from this level of destruction. There was nothing left. Not even the ground it stood upon. Not even the foundation of the country was left alone to stand. Even that had to cave in.

There was a familiarity in standing so high up, staring down at the world below, knowing it would just take him leaning forward enough to fly through his last life. Except instead of staring down to the lava pits of the nether, Tommy stared down to the near bedrock level indent in his country, the hole in his heart. An unfinished symphony that will truly and forever remain unfinished. If only he had managed to take back the one thing that started everything, that if he actually managed to achieve something this symphony that they all started would have lived on in a beautiful melody in the history books of the future. Had Tommy retrieved the rest of his disks he could have enjoyed their music in relief of knowing he had secured everything they had set out to do.

But he didn't. There was no grand music, no happy ending. Instead the rain poured loudly against his cold form. He couldn't hear the words of the people around him. Instead his own thoughts corrupted his head. Why. Why did it turn out this way? Why did it happen again? Why couldn't he have a home? Why? Why did Philza turn a blind eye to him? Why did Techno not see the pain he caused and not feel anything? Why did Dream target everyone instead of him? Why? It should have been him. It should have been him. It should have been you.

Tears ran down his face, blending with the rain around him, shaky breath smothered by the rolling thunder. Everything was gone because he wanted to sew up loose ends so badly, "Tommy!" The loud voice of his friend startled him, head quickly snapping to the side as his eyes looked to Tubbo's. His friends' eyes at least had a slight gleam from the tears in them, Tommy's just looked dead, "Were you even listening?" He asked, a bit harsher than he should have, but in the moment he couldn't care. Having just lost everything he worked so hard for had its own effects.

"I," he stumbled over his words, "I'm sorry. I don't know, I, I don't know what just happened." His voice was low and broken, cracked from the crippling pressure of the world crashing around him. Tubbo seemed just as devastated from the destruction, and yet only found frustration in Tommy's emptiness, "You don't know what happened? Look around us Tommy! For God's sake we are standing on the machine that blew up L'Manburg! And, and you don't know what's happened?" As Tubbo's voice climbed in volume, his tears only seemed to spill more.

The reaction only crushed Tommy, instinctively he held his arms close as he curled in, trying to force his larger posture into something smaller than his friends, trying to seem less challenging and more apologetic, "I'm, I'm sorry Tubbo." He hates you. Suddenly the blond shook his head, trying to throw out whatever tried whispering to them, "Yeah, well I find that hard to believe right now." He hates you. The voice continued to taunt him, he just tried to ignore it as they stared out over the remains of ash.

Silence overtook the group as they just took everything in, the painstakingly awful sight wrenched their overwhelmed hearts. Why? The world would have been so beautiful had Tommy just given into Dream. Why? The world still would have been here if he just remained with Technoblade. Why? The world would have still been here had he never left Phil's side all those years ago. Why are you the reason it's gone?