Mandos

Chapter V

Findekáno is like he said with his siblings.

He tells them about the life of the king from all of the Noldor and how it is nearly more exhausting than in Beleriand: "The Noldor are angry because the Valar are thinking about to free our whole family. They are afraid that there will be an Aloqualonde 2.0."

Turukáno snorts and the youngest brother recognizes me.

"Hello Maitimo. Why aren't you coming to us?", Arakáno means.

I smirk and I look unsure how to deal with the situation, to Findekáno and he just smiles at me with the warmest blue eyes I have ever seen.

Why do you always forgive me?

So I sit with my cousins and we intensively discuss the fear of the Noldor. We aren't mad at them. Well, I'm not. I do understand that they must be afraid of me.

Because I haven't a feeling for time in these halls, it could've passed hours till Maeglin, Aradehl's son, joins us and confusedly asks: "Uncle Fingon?"

Findekáno turns around and looks at his nephew.

"Hey little one, didin't see you for a while. How are you? Do you annoy your mother and your uncles like I've told you?", Findekáno stands up and goes to Maeglin.

Before Findekáno arrives at him Turukáno says: "That was you?" "Well, we should have known. Who else would say something like this?", Arakáno means.
Aredhel giggels.

A happy family.
I shouldn't be here.

Their big brother sighs dramaticly before he hugs his nephew and says: "I missed you, little one."

The picture of Fing-Findekáno where he helds a kid in his arms seems so familliar, so right.

Erenion.

I bite myself on the lip and try to displace the memories of how I hated the child from him, from my husband, and it got worse every time I saw him.

Of course, Gil-Galad is not his real son but Findekáno loved him as if he were.

With me ad a husband Findekáno wasn't able to get a heir to the throne of the noldor.

This was one of many doubts that followed me within our relationship. I could never imagen why and how he loves me.

Maybe he found a woman who stole him his heart....

I would celebrate it and yes, I would be happy for him even if it's the most repulsive thought I have.

He deserves so much better.

He, the hero of the eldar could have anyone he wants. But he choosed me.
Maybe after he died he made a other decision.

"Maitimo?", the moment I hear this beloved voice, I raise my head to meet oceanic blue eyes.

I smirk and whisper: "Findekáno, what .... where are the others?"

He giggels and shakes his perfekt black locks. His eyes sparkle.

Eru, this smile, those eyes.... should be forbidden.

He is my drug. My light. The reason why I'm not with Morgoth in the outer-darkness right now.

I love you.

He responses: "They are with ada and uncle Feanor. For the farewell."

With the last sentences everything in me contracts.

He can't go!

Finno, I need you!

Of course he knows my opinion and means with pity in his voice: "I do not wanna go either, Maitimo. Namo thinks that my time here is over. My people need me."

He takes my right hand in his and follows the lines with his finger.

My hand burns.

I love you.

I look at our hands and wish that we have more time.

"Can you come back?", I choke out. I feel that the tears begin to fall.

Findekáno swips the tears from my face and says: "Do not cry, Maitimo."

He didin't answer to my question.
Not a good thing.

"Findekáno", I sigh and look at him.

Don't make it any worse. Just say it.

He closes his eyes and looks down.

Now he doesn't has to say anything. I did understand.

Findekáno looks at me again with tears in his eyes and without words I swipe them out of his face. I freeze when he says:

"I love you, Maitimo."

Why?

My hand tremors and he looks at me, expecting an answer. I smirk like an Idiot and he kisses me.

I love you too, Findekáno.

To the farewell party we go with clasped hands.

I smile because I know that no matter how long it will take, he would wait.

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This was my story! 😄

I hope you liked it. 😊

Bye! 👋

~HighQueen01