Bungo Stray Dogs Oneshots

Akutagawa Ryunosuke x Reader - A Warm Embrace

*DISCLAIMER: ANGST & DEPRESSION

DESCRIPTION

It was always Y/N, Aku and Gin. As far back as Y/N could remember. Akutagawa was always so strong, protecting Y/N and Gin, before they were finally picked up by the Port Mafia. Despite not liking being touched, Akutagawa would never push Y/N away. But what will he do when they stop acting like themselves?

I stare at the same four walls day in and day out, calling in sick everyday for the past god knows how long now. I've completely lost track of time now, I can't even remember the last time I washed my hair, did my laundry, simple things like that. I don't even think I've opened the blinds in the past few weeks.

Akutagawa calls every now and again asking if I need anything or if I need him to come over, Gin too. It's sweet and all but... in honesty, I just don't want to be seen like this. I've been lost in a haze of sadness and despair for some time now. All I can bring myself to do is sleep, eat when I can be bothered to and watch TV. How dull. I wonder how long it's been since a smile crossed my features...

My thoughts are cut relatively short as my phone begins to ring next to me somewhere within the huddled mess of blankets, tissues, and empty food containers/cans of juice. I fumble around looking for my phone amongst the mess, managing to get to it just as the ringing stops. 'Oops too late...' I think to myself before hearing the familiar ping of a message being received.

'Y/N? Are you okay?' Akutagawa messaged.

'Yeah, I'm alright.' I lie in response.

'Don't lie to me. It's almost been 2 and a half weeks. You don't even let me in to see you, what's actually going on?' He responds rather quickly.

'Nothing, really.' I reply.

'Then I'll be coming over after work.'

'Aku, you don't have to do that I'm fine.' My reply is sent, but not read.

I shake my head, he's stubborn enough to actually show up so I suppose the least I can do is clean a little and get myself cleaned up. I groan as I get up, out of the nest of blankets and trash I made over the past two weeks apparently...

I stretch and yawn before I begin to pick up my trash, taking it through to the kitchen, only to realise my kitchen bin was already filled. I roll my eyes and grab another bin bag and begin to put the trash in, bit by bit the room seems somewhat cleaner. I walk to my room, tossing some dirty clothes into a basket to get washed along with the blankets I kept myself wrapped in.

After putting the washing machine on, I walk to my wardrobe, picking out some fresh, clean clothes, laying them out to put on after I come out the shower. I then walk to the bathroom, turning the shower on, stripping my dirty clothes from myself and letting the water hear up before jumping into the now hot shower.

I stay in the shower for a while after washing myself, letting the hot water run down my back, it was actually pretty nice, though I got so lost in my thoughts and the feeling of the hot water running down my back that I didn't hear my front door being slammed open. It wasn't until I heard a familiar voice yelling my name from behind my bathroom door that I was snapped back into reality.

"Y/N! Y/N is everything alright?" Akutagawa yells loud enough for me to hear over the sound of the spraying water of the shower.

"Aku?" I call out in response, turning the shower off, grabbing my towel to wrap myself in. "Yeah I'm fine, I went for a shower, sorry." I respond. "I'll be out in a few minutes, go wait in the living room."

"Okay." He responds, his footsteps getting quieter as he walks down the hall to the living room.

I dry myself off, walking back to my room. My hair still wet, though I can't really be bothered to dry it so I just dry it as much as I can with my towel and brush it as is, which took some time because it was very knotted and tangled, which was a painful process. I then remove my towel, putting it into a laundry basket and getting changed into my clothes rather quickly before joining Aku in the living room.

"Sorry for the wait." I say, walking into the living room to see Aku, his expression looked so dejected.

"Why didn't you let me see you all this time?" He asked, gritting his teeth sightly.

"I-" I looked down at the ground, suddenly feeling meek. "I didn't want you to see me in that state." I respond quietly.

"Idiot." He replies, standing up and walking over to me.

I took a few steps back as he began walking towards me slowly, his expression borderline unreadable, I barely had the guts to look him in the eyes. Eventually I backed up to a wall. He stopped mere inches from me, towering over me. He slammed his right hand against the wall to my left, basically sandwiching me between himself and the wall.

"Do you have any idea how worried I've been?" He asked, his voice... shaking?

"I'm sorry Aku..." I couldn't even think of the words to say, my heart felt like it was being crushed with every moment that passed, then I felt something land on my face, liquid running down. "Aku... Please don't cry!" I look him in the eyes, a few tears fell from his eyes, landing onto my face as if they were drops of rain.

"You could've told me you were going through something! I'm always here for you." He said, placing his head on my right shoulder, tears staining my top slightly.

I stood there, almost frozen unsure of what to do, so many emotions wrapping their way around my brain. Love, fear, anxiety, sadness, the warmth of his touch. So many thoughts barging into my mind at once, my eyes begin to water.

He moves his head from my shoulder, backing up slightly to look me in the eyes, his eyes widening slightly at the sight of the tears now falling from my face. I muffle a cry and wrap my arms around him quickly. Breaking into a fit of tears, repeating 'I'm so sorry Aku' over and over and over again until my voice becomes hoarse and sore, until we both fell, like a puddle on the ground embracing one another.

His warmth comforting me greatly as I cried and cried. He rubbed my back, his hand gliding up and down so gracefully. After my last few tears fell the only sound remaining was my muffled sniffling as I buried my head into Akutagawa's chest, breathing in his scent and listening to the beating of his heart.

"Y/N? Are you okay now? I'm not going anywhere okay. I'll stay here with you no matter what, I promise." He says gently, holding me close and tightly, protectively.

"Aku?"

"Yeah?" He asks.

"I love you." I say softly.

"I love you too, Y/N." He replied, softly.

I got out of his chest, looking up at him, smiling for a moment as his face got closer to mine until he placed his forehead against mine, our noses touching gently as he smiled in return, a peaceful smile.

"I'll always love you..."