"Haath chodh do, is baar wapis thaamungi nahi."
She turned around fixing her welled up eyes into his, and he slowly left the grip of his hand on hers.
"Preeta.."
"Nahi. Iss baar nahi rokna Karan, na bulanaa, aur na hi lene aana. Kyunke ab nahi aungi mai."
He gulped and his eye left a tear.
She stepped forward, with her back facing his. There was a silence. She didn't take another step for 2 minutes.
But then she did. And so did he. Another step, and some more distance between them. Just between their bodies? Or the hearts too?
"Rokoge nahi?" Her voice shivered as she said this.
"Tumne hi toh kaha, rukogi nahi." He didn't want to say this, but he had to.
"Aise toh maine bohot kuch kahaa hai Karan. Tum toh aise kehrahe ho jaise meri har baat maante ho."
Her moking laugh acted like a scissor on his heart. He felt like breaking a glass in his palm.
Not because of her words, not because of what she said and why did she say that to him. But because it was true, and why was it true. It shouldn't be true. It shouldn't have been. But it was all his fault and he knew that. He didn't have any answers and he knew that she would do it right walking away from him. But still, he wanted her. Love is selfish, as well as selfless. It makes you kill the whole world, and your own self for that one person.
"Itna aasaan hogaa mujhse door jaana? Mujhe bhool janaa, itna aasaan hogaa tumhare liye?"
"Tumhare liye bhi toh itnaa hi aasaan raha hai hamesha, mera saath dene ke waade karke unn waadon ko bhool janaa. Haina?"
"Nahi."
"Kya nahi?"
"Unn waadon ko bhoola nahi mai kabhi. Bas, aise halaat hojate thay hamesha, ke woh waade ghalat lagne lagte thay aur unn hi ghalat sochon mein bohot si ghalatiyan kardeen."
Their backs were facing each other, while their eyes were welled up with hurt. He didn't have the courage to turn around, and she didn't have the patience.
"Agar mera haath thaam ke rakkha hota hamesha, toh ghalatiyan nahi hoteen yeh toh mai nahi kahungi, magar humdono saath milkar unn ghalatiyon ko sudhar sakte, aur har ghalat se lad sakte Karan. Bhale hum haarte, magar saath hokar woh dard na hota jo abhi horahaa hai, tumhe bhi, aur mujhe bhi."
He bit his lower lip sqeezing his eyes and turned around.
"Abhi bhi der nahi hui hai Preeta.."
"Hogayi hai Karan. Der hogayi hai. Mujhse.. ab nahi bardasht hota. Tum har baar wahi baatein, wahi waade karte ho. Kaise karloon tumpe bharosa? Kaise maanloon ke iss baar ye tumhara koi game plan nahi hai ya, dobara phir tumhare dimagh ka dusron ke haathon manipulation nahi hogaa?"
Tears were flowing from his eyes uncontrollably. He didn't know what to do, what to say.
Karan held his forehead as he felt a twinge in it.
"Waise, kabhi kabhi mai samajh nahi paati hoon tumhara pyaar Karan. "
"Maine kab kaha ke mai tumse pyaar karta hoon Preeta?"
His reply made her speechless. Like yeah, her mind also questioned her the same. When did he say that he loves her? Why the hell did she say that!
"Maine kab kaha ke tum mujhse pyaar karte ho. Pyaar toh ek aisaa ehsaas hai, jo tum samajh bhi nahi sakte."
"Tum yeh kaise kehsakti ho ke mai nahi samajh sakta pyaar kya hota hai?"
"Samajh sakte ho? Kabhi kiya hai kisi se pyaar? Sachha pyaar?"
____________
A two or three shot :)
