Intermissions (homestuck)

"gotta keep me fresh, huh?"

-ONE WEEK PRIOR-

Continuation of chapter.5

You stooped down to grab your jeans off the floor after kicking his T-shirt off their gray fabric. With a groan you righted yourself, deciding to play nice and kiss ass by generously tossing him his shirt that you had initially intended to ignore. He caught it, eyeing you with the most attentive glower as you slipped into your jeans and did that retard hop to affectively pull your skinny jeans to your hipbones.

 You always wore them kind of low since you were already so short that your size ran a tad bit small. Added the fact that they usually fit perfectly fine because your ‘buff’ and ‘chiseled’ chest lacked in the everyday teenage testosterone fueled vigor of an adequately developed six pack. Hell no you didn’t have a six pack nor did you ever think you would but you weren’t nerdishly scrawny. Fuck muscles. Who needs that shit anyways?

What you did need was for that fuckass over there lacking his characteristic 3D glasses to cease his bipolar actions. One second, as you were hefting up your jeans, he was scowling at you with a blaming look of anger. The next, he’s sauntering over towards you before you could protest and buttoning your jeans for you with dangerously nimble fingers. “Here, let me.”  He breathed index’s hooking into the waistband of your skinny’s and pulling you towards him.

Your hand immediately went to his forearm to steady yourself while you bit your tongue to keep form shouting any and possibly all the profanities you knew at him in a downward spiraling argument complete with explicit hand gestures and frustrated groans. He didn’t seem to notice your antagonism, however, and after your zipper was sufficiently zipped and your button secured he then gave your chest an intolerably prickish pat.

Even though he then turned to exit the room with a final wink and tsk tsk you couldn’t help but feel overly insulted. Hell, you knew that that had been on purpose and that, yes, he was majorly pissed at you for blowing him off to go assist your more than likely highly intoxicated roommate get through the door. It wasn’t like you could just leave him outside though for Gog’s sake!

Besides you still owed him, you reasoned with dread. You absolutely hated that feeling of guilt that came with knowing you were indebted to someone. It was possibly attributed to the fact that you usually never, ever, let anyone help you with anything and thus being offered the desperately needed assistance from someone had you rather cross over the subject. That and even though you were sure you should of paid a bit of rent by now, he had neglected to ask you for your share.

You jumped when a text tone alerted you to a new message that you easily guessed was from the one who had your thoughts a conflicted mass of shitty indecision. Steadying your heart rate you quickly reached for the cell you had slide into your back pocket on to flip it open and thus were thrown into an encounter of a massive wave of irritation.

“Kaarrrrrrrrrrbrroooooooo?????? :o) It’S pReTtY cOlD oUt HeRe, BuT tAkE yOuR tImE mOtHeR fUcKeR. I CaN hAnDlE iT”

You snapped it shut in one harsh movement that admittedly should have cracked your screen or worse, however this time you got lucky. But you knew you had to answer because if you didn’t he would continue sending you irritating messages that were something of the enraging effect of your name yet spelled with a ludicrously over emphasized amount of letters or a ‘HoNk’ or more ‘:o)’. Winky if he got really impatient. ‘;o)’

“CALM THE FUCK DOWN. I’LL BE THERE IN LESS TIME THAN IT TAKES YOURS CLOWNY ASS TO UNSTICK YOUR FROZEN BALLS FROM THE DOORKNOB.”   You replied, punching in the letters a bit too forcefully yet not giving one untamable flying fuck as you returned it to your back pocket and turned the corner of the bedroom wall.