What about our garden? (Tsukkiyama angst)

Promises--9

Today was just another day. Not a good one,not a bad one. Yams could give simple answers today. No sentences though,that was too much.
They probably had a month left. He was so sick. So thin. So pale. You would think this boy was dead without the subtle beep of the heart monitor,or  without knowing the boys slight reactions. only tsukki seemed to know the reactions,not even the nurses seemed to notice the difference between when the boy was awake or asleep. The heart monitor was the only thing reminding tsukki that this boy was still alive. Still here. He still had time.

  Every night tsukki spent in the hospital,would be spent cuddling the other, watching a movie,then sleeping. Well one of them would sleep. Tsukki would just listen to the heart monitor.
He never did manage to bring the boy his flower,like promised.

 
"Flower....field."
The blonde was snapped out of his thoughts by yams weak voice, causing him to look up from the movie they were watching.
"You wanna go to the flower field,my love?"
A small nod was seen by the other.
" it's December though,dashi. It's too cold. I can ask.... But it's freezing. Too risky."
He felt so awful denying the boy,but what could he say.
Was he supposed to take him there in the freezing cold. Let him get sick. Let him be taken away too early. No. He couldn't.
"0-oh....k."
Yams had a slight look of disappointment on his face. He knew it was cold. He knew it was horrible of him to ask kei something the boy would have to deny. He knew he couldn't go. He just wanted one more chance. Just to see the flowers again. Just one more time.
That would be...perfect.
"I'm so sorry yams. I-I just can't loose you yet. We can't risk it." A few tears rolled down the boys face. He hated the fact that in a month or so he was going to loose this boy.
All he could think about was before. Before he was sick. Before everything bad happened.

 
Memories flooded the blondes head. How much he'd give to just be back there. Back when they made that first promise. Back when they made the second one. Back on their first date. Back....back before the headaches.

~~~~~~~~the second promise~~~~~~

They lay in a flower field. Not their one,but still a nice enough one. This one was a little smaller;not so private either. It was pretty though. It had all the normal flowers. It seemed to have a million sunflowers,though.
A million yellow flowers against all the other plain,non-special ones.
The boys were Cuddled into each other. You probably couldn't even fit a piece of paper between the two.
A smile was stretched across both of their faces. They didn't have a care in the world. They were with each other and the flowers. The only things that mattered.
"H-hey tsukki?"
"Hmm?"
"Can we have a a garden together?"
"What do you mean dashi?" Both boys were half asleep so the words came out ever so slightly slurred. Moonlight glowed on their skin.
"Well if we live together-"
"We will."
"When we live together can we have a nice garden? I want to plant all sorts of flowers there. We can look at it together. Our project."

"That would be nice. Yeah..... really nice."
"We can have lots of sunflowers too,kei."

"You're my favourite flower dashi."
"That makes no sense kei." A giggle filled the air.
"It does."
"Explain it then."
"I don't need to. It makes sense. You're just tired."
"Hmm if you say so tsukki."
"Do you promise we'll have a garden?"
"Yes. I promise." Yams switched their hands from entangled to just holding pinkies. He bought kei's hand up to his lips and placed a kiss on the boys thumb. Their classic promise ritual.
"We will live together,right?"
"Of course we will,tsukki. I wouldn't want to live with anyone else." Now he placed a kiss on the boys shoulder,where his head was currently buried.
"Always and forever? Remember,kei."
"Always and forever,my love."
Then sleep consumed them both.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Yesterday,the sick boy had asked to go to the flower field. Today was even colder. Painful wind and frost touched everything. Yams must of had at least 4 blankets and tsukki's hoodie.

"You warm enough my love?"
A ever so slight nod came from said boy.
"I'm glad. It is pretty bloody cold today."
Tsukki adjusted himself on the bed,he was now resting his head against the mountain of pillows behind yams. Kei always made sure there was enough pillows. Yams needed to be comfortable.
"I've got to do something for a little bit today. I'm sorry I won't be here for the full day like excepted. i will be back though, i promise.  suga will be here whilst i do the stuff, that okay? i know you hate being alone, so i asked him to come. if you want i can ask for daichi,hinita,kageyama instead if you want. or even yachi, she hasn't been in a while. it really sucks that they aren't visiting anymore, it's wrong. they should be visiting you--"

"k-kei d-on't w-worry...... o-okay" that sentence made the tears overflow from kei's eyes. he hadn't heard a proper sentence from the other in far too long.

"so suga, he's coming. you sure that's okay?" another slight nod came from the sick one. kei half expected another sentence, but one had clearly exhausted tadashi enough. what tsukki would do just to hear one more sentence.  just one more sentence with tadashi's bittersweet voice. 

Tsukishima leant over and grabbed tadashi's bony hand.

"okay then,my love. after the movie, i'll have to get going."

He didn't even get a nod this time. 

"your'e really tired,huh? just go to sleep dashi. it's okay. i'll stay with you,until the movies over. i promise."

after having the reassurance tadashi let sleep wash-over him.

'goodnight tsukki'~~the last thought in tadashi's head before he was finally asleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"hey....what was it you wanted help with,tsukishima?" as soon as daichi came into tsukki's vision, the first question came.

"i need to get flowers.... lots of flowers. we need to set them up in yams's room. just like the flower field. that's his favourite place, he asked to go there yesterday. it's too cold to take him.  i wish i could take him there, just one last time."

"okay... we can do that."