Bound

Even with my dark side

This morning I woke up with a dark cloud over me. I've never felt this bad in my life. After how Katie treated me I was no doubt angry. But I was scared to tell my dad in fear that he'll be mad at me for exposing myself without his knowledge on the matter. Katie instantly put me in a box the minute she saw me and that really crushed my spirit. I didn't even have the strength to get out of bed myself. When dad woke up he helped me into my wheelchair and wheeled me downstairs for breakfast. "What would you like?" He asked enthusiastically. "Just toast with butter and orange juice." "Coming right up!" Dad said.

I guess dad didn't notice how depressed I still was. Katie....the person I talked to for over a year hurt me.... like it was just so easy to speak such wrathful words like that TO MY FACE! Tears streamed down my cheeks but I wiped them away as soon as dad came in with my breakfast. "Here you go my little buddy." "Thanks dad." I didn't eat my toast until dad sat down with his breakfast. We started eating together. "Coop, is something bothering you?" Dad asked concerned. I shook my head. "No I'm just tired."

I wasn't quite sure if dad believed me or not but my focus was to just finish my breakfast and go upstairs to my room and hide there. I tried not to eat too fast cause the last thing I really needed was hiccups or for dad to have to do the heimlich maneuver. It would be so embarrassing. After breakfast, I asked dad if he could wheel me upstairs to my room. Dad agreed but I somehow knew that wasn't the end of it. And sure enough it wasn't.

When my dad wheeled me into my room he didn't leave. Instead he sat on my bed and turned me towards him. "Coopie..... I've noticed you've been really quiet lately and I just wanted to know if everything was alright?" I couldn't look up. It's like my head was weighing down to the floor. "Yeah." I said not really making myself believable. Dad gently lifted my chin up to his face. "You can tell anything right?" He said softly. Tears welled in my eyes. "It's... this girl." Dad just listened. "She saw me at the park and we'll......we had talked to each other earlier but she didn't know I was handicapped."

Dad continued looking at me sympathetically. "Did she say anything to you?" I hesitantly shook my head. Dad tilted his head. "You can tell me coopie." "She said......" I choked on the lump in my throat. "Sh-She told me that didn't have the time for someone like me. She called me a cripple and later on a loser." Dad's jaw dropped. He slowly pulled me into a hug when the lump from my throat finally came unplugged. I let out soft sobs into my dad's chest. "What's wrong with me?" I sobbed. "Nothing! There's something wrong with that girl. She should never have said those things to you and to call someone a cripple and a loser is beyond uncalled for!"

Dad just rubbed my back. "It'll be okay." "I get it that she would be taken aback because she didn't expect me to be in a wheelchair, but-"

"But that's no excuse to hurt someone's feelings like that!" My dad interrupted. I snuffled. Dad held me for what felt like hours. I knew he probably had more important things to do but instead he spent them with me. "Is there anything I can do to make you feel better?" I shrugged. "How about I make your favorite dessert and order your favorite dinner?" I nodded and smiled. Dad kissed my forehead and he went into his room. I wheeled myself over to my laptop 💻 and started playing some games on it to pass time. But I went back to Instagram again contemplating on wether I should make another account or not. To be honest I felt a lot better after I told dad about Katie but I still felt down because I can't erase the things she said.

I'm trying to but.... it's just not as easy as sounds. Later on dad made my favorite dessert and ordered my favorite dinner as promised. We had pizza with hot wings and for dessert, chocolate cake with an ice cold coke. That did make me feel better. Dad told me to brush my teeth after dessert because of all the sugar. I promised dad I would even though I forgot up till the last minute. As I was brushing my teeth I kept thinking about making another Instagram account. But I decided not to for now.

In fact I think it'll be awhile before I have the confidence and courage to start another account again.