Leave Me [AoT/SnK]

Preface

Way too perfect song to describe Noemi's feelings, Smother by Daughter. On YouTube, youlazybum has an awesome Attack on Titan video using this song. Go watch it.

"And all I loved, I loved alone."

- Edgar Allan Poe

She was drinking stolen ale, drowning in liquid happiness.

She used to think she would never drink. Her father served as a great warning example.

She took another swig at that thought.

Wall Rose had a beautiful view at night she determined.

She was finally off duty.

It was all okay.

Footsteps fell not far behind her position leaned on a dismantled cannon. Just by the sound, she knew exactly who it was. He had a way of walking that differed from anyone she knew. He stood over her slouched form. She shamelessly drank before him in spite of the loom of his title. Their eyes met, and he looked on. He never knew how to meet her eyes longer than a few seconds.

"Stealing is a serious crime."

"He probably already knows I took it," she excused. Another large gulp of the bitter liquor, and she felt a small twinge of weightlessness. It was the only way to the cope with her morbid, masochistic lifestyle.

"You're not setting a good example for your cadets," he continued. His voice was deep, and she suddenly wished he would talk more just so she could hear the verbal bliss.

"They'll never see."

"Would your sister be proud of you in this moment? Would she even find herself in this situation?"

That pinched a nerve. The flask left her fingers reluctantly. "Nope. She would never be seen on the Wall anyway."

The alcohol sloshed as it was tucked away by the man for safe keeping. He bent down to sit rather improperly next to her. Neither dared to risk a glance at the other in fear of the paralyzing effects.

"How are your sisters?" He asked offhandedly. She knew how he played. He would ask normal questions, make normal conversation, and normal human gestures, but never look at her. That would be fatal.

"They're fine," she answered blandly.

"Good." They both faced the length of the wall as it spread out over land with an almost unseen curve, disappearing into the vague darkness. Small rays still broke the horizon as the sun fell.

"How's Nile?"

He chuckled. "You and I both know I haven't held a proper conversation outside of work with the man in a very long time."

"He has a family," she muttered.

"Yes."

"I always knew the bastard was a softie. There's a reason he's not sitting here sharing a drink with me."

"You did bully him an awful lot in training," he reminisced. A small smile tugged at the woman's lips.

"You know, I ran into his wife the other day. They got a two kids and another on the way. Snot nosed little buggers. They all look like her."

"Do they?" His voice fell to a softer, more quiet tone. It was unusual for him. She was well aware of the healing wound she just cut open with a rusted knife. Her head cast down in her shame. Her hair slipped from the braid she created that morning.

"Sorry," she whimpered. She knew. She knew so well that she was in the wrong to cast a blow so low. It was terrifying just how much she wanted to see him wallow in the same misery as herself just so she could take advantage.