Backslide-Blackkat

Chapter 14

Kakashi waits until the genin are a good ten minutes down the trail to take his seat across the fire from Kurama. The redhead glances up at him with mild interest, which is far better than the growling, snapping, and snarling Kakashi got when he went to wake the other jounin yesterday morning.

Honestly, Kakashi hadn't even known the man could be grumpy—though, granted, perhaps leaning right down into Kurama's space and staring him awake wasn't the best way to get on his good side. The man has fast reflexes, and only Kakashi stealing the three kunai and set of poisoned senbon out from under his pillow kept those reflexes from being deadly.

But Kurama is quiet this morning, something easy in the set of his shoulders and the lines of his face. His blue eyes are calm and almost serene, and in the very first light of dawn filtering down through the trees his garnet hair glows brighter than coals. The scars on his face are milder in this light, not so much kinder as simply lesser. The golden skin glows, the tattooed seal shimmer faintly violet, and he looks somehow both strange and entirely suited to this place, this moment inside of time.

Kurama is beautiful, though no one would ever mistake him for a woman.

Kakashi's never particularly thought of beauty as confined to a single gender, anyway.

He meets blue eyes squarely, to find them regarding him in return, thoughtful and composed, with no hint of the shaking, grieving man who bolted from Kakashi's apartment the other day as though a whole pack of missing-nin were on his heels. Instead, there's a centered sort of peace, closer to acceptance, and Kakashi figures this is about as close to a perfect opportunity as he'll ever get.

It's just about all he's thought of lately, aside from planning this trip. Kurama and his smile and his laugh and his lips, his wry good humor and the sharp edge of his tongue and the way his hair seems to catch the light and burn. Maybe Anko was the catalyst, but these thoughts aren't new. Even now Kakashi remembers that afternoon in the rain, when all the world was a wonder and Kurama was the one to let him see it, witness his village through the eyes of a stranger with no roots to keep him steady. Not then, but Kakashi would like to think that Konoha has given him roots again, ties to people and a place and an idea.

Because the Will of Fire burns just as brightly in Kurama as any Konoha-bred shinobi—brighter, Kakashi sometimes thinks—and he's good for them, for all of them. The lost Uzumaki, and maybe it's destiny that he settled in Konoha after wandering for so long with the wind. Other Uzumaki have found a home there, and with any luck and hope at all Kurama will as well.

There's an expectant sort of openness in Kurama's face as he watches the other jounin, mug of tea cradled between his palms. It smells faintly floral, delicately sharp, and it fills Kakashi's lungs when he takes a breath in preparation.

"The other day," he says softly, and it's a relief when Kurama doesn't tense. The redhead simply looks at him, even though it's entirely clear what he's talking about. There's no other response, though, and Kakashi resigns himself to muddling through this the hard way and forges on. "It was...my idea, and Anko's presence, but—" He fumbles, not sure how to end that sentence regardless of how many time's he's rehearsed this in his head.

Did you want to kiss him? Iruka's voice whispers in his ear, and yes, he does, which is half the problem. Kakashi doesn't do things like this. Have relationships. Want to kiss people on anything more than a one-night-only basis. He hasn't ever had a stable anything with someone else, and the thought of having his first when it's actually important is mildly terrifying.

(Or completely petrifying, one of the two.)

But Kurama is watching him thoughtfully, and his blue eyes have a faintly warm crinkle to them, amused and sympathetic and kind, and it eases the wild lurching in Kakashi's chest. Another moment and Kurama drops his gaze, looks down at the cup in his hands and twists it carefully, making the pale green liquid shimmer.