Thoughts Can Hurt || Percy & Avengers Crossover

that one time I saved the world but nobody thanked me

They say you lose something in war.

Everybody does. No matter who or what you're fighting for. No matter which side 'technically' wins.

In war, there are no winners. Only survivors.

And one out of three soldiers aren't gonna be thanking anybody that they made it out.

Because at the end of every war, there are casualties. It feels wrong to say casualties, there's nothing casual about death. There is no casual anything when you're losing friends, family and brothers and sisters in arms.

I've heard some soldiers say that death didn't leave when it took their comrades, that it came after them too. They said that it was the price for survival. Because even if you survive you still lose. You'll never be the same.

The day the war ended we all died. We all lost people. Our bodies kept going but our souls folded in on us; we become nothing more than empty shells with no emotions except the loud exhaustion of being alive.

Death came for me when they took away my wisegirl. 

Rage and viciousness came  when I realized that there was no getting her back.

I can still remember how it happened. It kills me that I remember.

I pray everyday that the gods will let me forget it.

□ □ □ □

the day of the war

□ □ □ □

Annabeth smiled serenely. "It'll be okay, love."

Lies.

All lies.

We were drowning in lies at this point,

But how can the son of the sea god drown?

Annabeth struggled to put her hand on my cheek. Tears spilled out of her perfect, beautiful, grey eyes.

I let out a half sob, half laugh. I reached up and put my hand over hers. I held it tightly. My other hand still rubbed circles on her cheek.

"I love you Annie. I always have and I always will." Tears ran down my cheeks in endless streams, and my breath came out in short gasps.

Annabeth rubbed my cheek with her thumb tenderly; as if I were glass, about to shatter.

She smiled sadly. "Oh love... me too." Her eyes fluttered shut but she forced them back open a few seconds later. "Me too." She whispered.

I closed my eyes and tried to prepare for what's to come.

I knew I already did everything I could ––– my voice was sore from screaming for Apollo. When Annabeth crumpled to the ground, it was like the whole battle stopped. The only thing I could focus on was her. I watched her hit the ground and I watched as her dagger flew from her lifeless fingers. I screamed and I ran to her. I fell by my knees at her side, panicking and screaming for Apollo. But she knew. My wisegirl knew. She smiled at me sadly as tears ran down her cheeks and shook her head.