Shades of Gold and Blue | Finnick Odair

Twenty

Two days later and I haven't come out of my bedroom at the Victor's House. Barnabas and Dimitri have both tried to talk me out of the room and I've heard plenty of callers at the door; including Mags who I was told was followed by a very grumpy looking Marlin.

I couldn't bring myself to see any of them, especially not him. All my life I had been picturing a beautiful and loving reunion between me and my District Four family. A mother with tears in her eyes as we embraced, maybe an aunt introducing me to my cousins and grandparents to tell me how much I look like my Father. When I had agreed to take the envelope from Grandmother Valentina, I had assumed that she would have told me if I was going to be an unwelcome sight to my birth mother.

I had always known she had given me up. Mother had always told me that it was because I had reminded her of my birth father too much. But surely some of that heartbreak had worn off now. And surely she would have told my own Grandfather who I was. Wouldn't she?

The one thing that I had never considered was the possibility that my birth mother might still not want to see me, even now, even after all of these years to mourn and heal. Perhaps it would still be too much for her and even my presence here where she could see me but I couldn't see her, might be painful.

But the point remained that it wasn't everyday that girls from the Capitol ran off to live with fishermen. I had never heard of anyone else other than my mother doing so, and coming from a social group where frankly no one has anything better to do than gossip, I would feel fairly confident in saying that she was the only woman to have ever done so. I had heard of a woman who had left for District One before, to live with a very wealthy jewel merchant, but that wasn't quite so frowned upon. That man was still able to support her and he made regular trips to the Capitol to do business with the jewelers. A fisherman was quite different, scandalous even. It's why my Mother has always been so careful about any trips to see Grandmother Valentina and my Aunt Luna. And heaven forbid that my cousins ever found out, I'm not sure they even knew that their Aunt Lucretia had ever had a child – just that she had run away and wasn't allowed to return.

If I wanted to honor my promise to Grandmother Valentina and deliver her letter to Lucretia, then I would have to find her. And it was becoming increasingly clear that she wasn't simply going to reveal herself – whether out of fear, embarrassment, anger even. But there was one person who surely would know who my Mother was. Marlin.

Even though I was quite certain that he didn't know who I was, or rather, who I was to him. He would know that Lucretia had been pregnant when my birth father died and that the child had gone off to live with another family.

I rise from my bed and move cautiously over towards the window. I've heard them all out there for a while now, playing some kind of game out on the patio area. Gloss, Augustus and Finnick were barbecuing something, Marlin seemed in a much cheerier mood and was playing a ring toss game with the children, the rest of the Victors were cheering on the benches surrounding the patio and Mags was surrounded by balloons as she opened her birthday gifts with the most contented smile on her face.

I look over to the dressing table where a card and a small gift box sit amongst my things. With a small sigh I decide that I might as well bite the bullet and make an appearance whilst everyone is in a good mood.

I find a light green skirt that flows to the middle of my thighs and a white, silk crop-top – perfect for the sweltering heat that seems to have taken the district over for Mags's birthday. I slip my sandals on and check myself over in the mirror. I've picked up a bit of colour from my time in the sun over the past week and my cheeks and nose are constantly pink underneath the light scattering of freckles that have appeared. My eyes are a little puffy from the events of the last couple of days but nothing that can't be put down to some mild allergies should anyone be impolite enough to bring it up.