Heart in Caution (Heart Series #1)

T W E N T Y - S I X

I was awakened by the ray of light peaking through my window. I could still feel the soreness of my eyes due to too much crying and I couldn't feel my nose. Ramdam ko pa rin ang paninikip ng dibdib ko dahil sa nangyari. Matagal akong nakatulog kagabi dahil sa patuloy kong pag-iyak. Hanggang sa di ko namalayang nakatulog na pala ako dahil sa kakaiyak.

Dahan-dahan kong iminulat ang mga mata ko. Hindi ko na siya nararamdaman sa likod ko. Hindi ko man siya ramdam, ay ramdam ko naman ang higpit ng yakap niya sa akin kagabi na tila ba natatakot siyang humiwalay sa akin.

Nilingon ko ang hinigaan niya kagabi. Kung saan siya humiga habang mahigpit akong niyayakap. Hindi mababakas doon ang mga bakas ng paghiga niya. Na para bang hindi siya naririto kagabi. Na para bang hindi ko siya nakasama.

I slowly hugged the pillow that he used last night. I hugged it tight like it was him. I could still smell his scent on the pillow.

"The scent of the gagong attorney," I whispered.

I could feel my tears building up on every edge of my eyes. I could feel my heart bleeding. Sobrang sakit na hindi ako makahinga. Alam ko kasi na wala na... tapos na.

"Miss na kita agad, V-Ville." Bulong ko, hanggang sa tuluyan nang tumulo ang mga luha sa mga mata ko.

Malungkot akong ngumiti saka isinubsob ang mukha sa unan at doon umiyak. "V-Ville... I hope you're h-happy."

Humagulhol ako habang yakap-yakap ang unan niya ng mahigpit. I don't want to let go as if it was him. I know I'm hopeless but I still want to feel his scent.

Now who said again that people who left without a proper goodbye hurts more? Because I'm going to slap them with my situation right now. Mas masakit ang pang-iiwan na may maayos na pamamaalam. Dahil alam mo na sa paggising mo sa susunod na mga araw, alam mong wala na ang taong dati'y hinihintay mong makasama.

Mas lalo akong napahagulhol nang makapa ko ang kwentas na ibinagay niya sa akin. At mas lalo akong nanghina nang mapagtanto kong malapit na pala ang bagong taon. Hindi man lang namin naabutan.

Pero mas mabuti na rin iyon.. Para makasama na niya ng tuluyan ang pamilya niya. Ang quadruplets niya. Para sila ang maasikaso niya at hindi ako.

I sniffed and tried to wipe my tears. Dahan-dahan akong bumangon sa kama habang yakap-yakap pa rin ang unan na ginamit ni Ville. Pinulot ko mula sa mesa ang cellphone ko saka tinawagan si Ro.

I dialed her number and she immediately answered it.

"Hello, Irah? Why did you call?" Bungad niya.

I stifled my cries. "Hey, Ro. I'm going back there in California."

"What? Your break wasn't over yet. New Year is still coming. Are you sure you're going back?" she asked.

I nodded as if she could see it. "Yes, I'm pretty sure."

"Wait... something's off with your voice. Is there a problem? Are you okay? Are you sick? I bet you're not. What's the matter, Irah?"

"I'll tell you when I get back there. Just please book me a flight and ready my papers. Also, please email the show that had interviewed me last time. Tell them that I'm ready for another interview," I said--finalizing.

"Why is everything so sudden, Irah? You have to answer me. I'm in great turmoil right now, and I have tons of question that I, myself couldn't answer. I have to know if what's going on. Everything is just too sudden and--"

"Please just... just do it. I promise I'll tell you when I get back there. As of now, I have to prepare myself first for the interview," saad ko.

Narinig ko ang pagbuntong hininga niya mula sa kabilang linya. "Okay, fine. Just be sure that you're okay."