Restricted

12

The following night, Hermione was slouched in the cosy common room chewing her nails and repeating thoughts about only one thing.

She didn't dare retreat to the library tonight after last night, she couldn't risk his eyes on her again, let alone his lips on hers. Hermione had all day to ponder on it and she'd decided how getting involved with Malfoy really was a terrible idea.

So now she sat, alone and snuggled up and in her favourite red jumper that he would never get the luxury to see, because he certainly didn't deserve that. She thought about the skin tight red dress Ginny had forced her to buy earlier that year and wanted to smile, she could picture his expression as he looked at her. Perhaps she could watch him crumble.

The uncomfortable crackle of the fire and lack of books were extremely underwhelming compared to her usual surroundings. She missed the library and hated how she had to miss out, wondering if Draco had found any new information.

Strumming her fingers loosely on the side of the sofa, she decided that she'd return tomorrow night.
A short break from him was all she needed to clear her mind and focus on the task ahead. Less death eaters would equal an easier win for them.

The tea she held was scolding hot, but she didn't mind if it burned her palm. In fact it was easier that way, a good chance to forget about how cold his hands were in contrast, trailing across her thighs.

She shook her head and reached for Fred's alcohol cupboard in the corner of the common room, anything that would stop her from itching at her wrists and thinking about him.

~

The students had all been called to the great hall the next morning, and she'd tried to ignore Malfoy's sleek platinum hair and bored expression sat across on the slytherin table as Snape addressed the school.

Warned them of what was coming, warned them to stay out of it. How could they stay out of a war when it was their school to protect?

Hermione's lack of interest from the order meetings didn't come as a surprise to many. She'd avoided Ginny's updates and just smiled awkwardly at her friends she knew that they were devastatingly disappointed in her. Neville couldn't hide his shame in her and she knew exactly what he was thinking. She'd fought alongside Harry and Ron all these years at Hogwarts and now she'd given up hope?

But yes, he was right. She had.

Trying to ignore the newspaper articles that fluttered around the schools corridors. Another attack somewhere. Another reason to be scared. To feel guilty for spending her time with two death eaters when her friends needed her.
She wondered if Malfoy or Nott had even missed her presence last night. Doubtful. But it wouldn't stop her from returning tonight.

It was all she could think about, all day. She couldn't focus in lessons and certainly wasn't hungry for lunch. She felt sick, avoiding people around the corridors left right and centre.

After being dragged to dinner with an emotional Ginny Weasley, Hermione placed her bottom down beside the silent black lake. A minute to herself.

The sun was beginning to set, an orangey hue painting the sky, littered with grey clouds that reminded her of darkness to come. She hugged her knees tightly, fingers a beaming white from the cold chill in just her school uniform. Eyes gazing loosely across the still dark water to give herself a minute to breathe before she was once again a prisoner to the constricting walls of the library, with a certain slytherin playing on her mind.