Nora and the Mermaid |ONC 2021|

Chapter Five (1st Draft)

Nora-Bora

♡

Laffery went to town on the can of tuna laying at Nora's feet, scarfing it down like it was the fat cat's Last Supper. Occasionally, he'd press pause on his feasting to close his eyes and lick his whiskers, offering a prayer to the kitty messiah for that day's pretty rocking breakfast.

Nora slurped her coffee, a thick, cooled sludge of cheap knock-off brand coffee grounds purchased at the local 7/11. On the counter behind her, her toaster popped, displaying a burnt piece of rye despite the machine being on its lowest setting.

Frowning, Nora took a butter knife to the toast and set to scraping off the charred parts. It left her with little more than crumbs, but considering her stomach was a mess of knots and nausea, she decided a lite breakfast was ideal.

She took intermittent bits of toast, followed up by gulps of syrupy coffee while staring at her laptop screen. It displayed HEA's website in the browser in its full red, pink, gold and black color scheme. At the top was its unique, trademarked font that combined a romantic, handwritten cursive with the harder lines of Serif. Several diaper-wearing winged babies bobbed in and out of the page.

There was already a tab for success stories. A curvy woman, blond hair, blue-eyed and balancing on six inch heels stood next to a demon double their size. A dwarf stood in front of a roaring fire beside their partner, a beard-having business man, their facial hair intertwined, a tangle of wiry brown and orange hairs as they flashed the camera identical joyful grins. A golden-haired, tawny-skinned Fae draped in a toga gown cinched at the waist with braided gold cord was mid-kiss with a spritely looking woman who flaunted bushy red curls and a smattering of freckles.

Nora clicked the tab that opened her profile page. It read WinterMint23 in the top right, her four-am-and-not-so-sober created username.

The pic she'd used for per profile was from a year ago, snapped at the last family bbq she bothered attending. The picture showed Nora just after she'd graduated; once she'd shed the nose piercings and under eye circles. Her gaze was more focused than it ever had been, having cut back on the joints and looking less like a strung out dragon sprawled on her dorm room floor. She was smiling, and it'd seemed genuine. That's why she'd chosen it for her profile.

After that matter was finished, the rest of her profile set up came easily. She identified her pronouns, a requirement these days given the broader acceptance of gender fluidity, especially since many in the majjo community identified as third or non gendered.

Then she'd filled the 'about me' section with little tidbits about herself, nothing too personal while shying away from boring cliches (enjoying long walks, #saltlife, sunset selfies, etc). She wrote about her journey from college student to adult freeloader to first-time job getter and shortly after, job quitter.

She avoided the things she disliked and added the things she liked to keep her profile mostly positive. Things like the 'fancy' way she made her cup ramen, setting aside a pinch of the uncooked noodles for a crunchy topping post-microwave. How she loved gardening but couldn't get a weed to sprout, even if she begged. How a fat, gray-furred interloper was eating her out of house and home.

After that, she'd had her first interaction with the app's AI. The Fairy Godmother assigned to Nora called herself Tess and had a manic, distinctly feminine chirp. It reminded Nora of Tinker Bell, if Tink had dosed one too many times at Coachella.

Tess quizzed Nora about attraction, if she was open to dating beyond her comfort zone (given she was on an app specifically designed to set up humans with majjos, that question seemed a little redundant), what she looked for in a potential mate, her ideal date, etc. Standard fare given Nora's familiarity with other dating apps.