Memoirs of a Broken Guitar String (A Mafuyu x Uenoyama Fanfic)

Chapter 4 | Heal

Uenoyama's POV

The first time I met Mafuyu, I thought that he was a strange guy who didn't talk much because he didn't have anything to say. Now that I know him better, I think that he has much to say, but is afraid or doesn't know how to put it into words.

When I first heard him sing in that sunlight-filled staircase, it felt like his sound pierced through my soul. His voice was so powerful; it grabbed me immediately, but also sounded like it was full of sorrow. I can't even explain it. I just knew that I needed to hear it again so I asked him to join the band. To my utter shock, he declined and for some reason, it made me feel really agitated. Mafuyu has this natural hidden talent but doesn't want to use it. But why not?!

Needing to know the reason he declined, I went to try to find him. When I finally found him, there was a tense encounter with whom I assume was an old friend of Mafuyu's and a mention of someone named "Yuki" and his guitar. I didn't really have time to figure out what anything they said meant because the next thing I knew, Mafuyu was running away at full speed.

It was almost like my legs moved on their own because I was already chasing after him. I finally caught up to him and was trying to catch my breath. After grabbing his arm to make him stop running, he had this incredibly sad expression on his face, like he was about to cry. But there were no tears when I brushed his hair aside to check.

For some reason, seeing him like that felt like a stab through my chest. He looked so broken in that moment, so...lost. His eyes seemed so sad, like there was only a hollow shell of a person behind them and it broke me to see him that way. I wanted to know why he looked so shattered at the mention of that person's name and his guitar. Some questions immediately popped into my mind:

Who is Yuki and why did Mafuyu immediately look terrified as soon as that guy asked if the guitar belonged to him? Why would that cause Mafuyu to instantly flee without answering his questions? Argh, I don't understand anything!!

I asked him if what happened just now was related to why he didn't want to join the band. He said that it wasn't and shared how he believed that he was really bad at expressing himself compared to others. Hearing him say that people may be right when they say he's not thinking about anything made something inside me snap because it wasn't true!

He said that with such a pained look on his face and I just had to make him understand that he was wrong! He wasn't bad at expressing himself. His song truly moved me and I haven't felt that way in a very long time. I still can't forget the way he looked at me in that moment. It was like what I just told him was something impossible.

Meeting Mafuyu has probably made me a complete mess. He isn't the easiest person to understand and his moments of silence sometimes frustrates me, but I have a feeling there's something important he wants others to understand. He constantly seems lost in his own thoughts, like he's struggling to keep something unpleasant off his mind. I've decided to do everything possible to help him share his story. It's the least I can do after what he's done for me.

Mafuyu walked into my life and became my catalyst for enjoying music again. Before I met him, my passion for playing music was quickly fading, even though my technical skills were improving. My heart just wasn't in it anymore and I was just going through the motions, even when playing live shows. When he watched our band practice that first time, he looked so mesmerized and it reminded me of how excited I was about music when I first started playing guitar.

Spending time with him has jumpstart my love for music again and watching him learn so earnestly makes me smile. When I took him to the music shop to help pick out his first effects pedal, he was so appreciative over just being invited to come. Later, when I told the store owner that we were in a band together and his eyes lit up, it made my heart skip a beat. These were just simple gestures to me, but it seemed to matter so much to Mafuyu. His sheer enthusiasm from something so ordinary makes me wonder if maybe he secretly feels lonely.

Even though he doesn't say much, I feel like Mafuyu's eyes are the window to his soul; like there's a hidden story locked away behind them and I desperately want that key. The faraway look in his eyes sometimes feels like a distress call. When I gaze into those deep pools, I want to unlock the mystery behind those sorrowful eyes so that I can help him heal.

I should have known to be careful what I wish for.