Short Tales [Doflamingo×Dowly]

Pancakes

-Law, why are you calling me this early? -you yawn, shuffling towards the living room, holding the Dendenmushi in your left hand. -When Doffy heard it in his sleep he kicked me off the bed to shut it up.

-I'm pretty sure that he was awake. That devil. -snorts your brother.

-Do you have to? Law, just tell me what's going on. I want to sleep.

You sit on the sofa and start rubbing your eyes.

-It's Strawhat-ya again. -sniffles the majestic Surgeon of Death.

-Oh gosh, here we go again.

-Black Leg-ya forgot to lock the fridge and he ate everything. I wake up to the noise but it was too late...

-You really called me for this?

-I'm starving!

-When did this happen?

-Like twenty minutes ago.

-HOW THE HELL ARE YOU ALREADY HUNGRY THEN??

-Oi, don't yell with me! -he huffs. -I didn't eat dinner.

You wait for the rest but Law stays silent.

Please-

-Because? -you ask, taking a deep breath.

-Because Bepo and the others. They are terrible, Lammy! Arguing all the time on little things, then coming to me to decide who is right.

-And who was right?

Why am I keeping up the conversation at all?

-Shachi. If a vampire bites a zombie, the vampire will become a zombie. Naturally. It's pure biology.

I will kill this man. It's not even 4 a.m, bro.

-That's a thing that you wake me up in the middle of my beauty sleep, but you are also wrong. -you sigh and you basically hear his eyes twitching.

-Excuse you?!

-Why the hell would a vampire bite a zombie?! Zombies are dead, they don't have flowing blood to drink.

*silence*

*distant snoring of a certain swordsman sounds, sometimes in synch with quiet murmuring of "meat, meat, meat"*

Every single time I win, Law remains quiet instead of admitting it. Men.

-But...

-There's no but, Law!

-I bet there are idiot vampires who do.

VIHSVOHSVSVOSVUSOUSVU.

-You know what, just go and sleep or eat or hell knows! I will go crazy, good ni-

-DON'T LEAVE ME ALONE, LAMMY!

-Stop being hysterical, just go and eat on your own ship.

-That's the problem.

-CAN'T YOU SAY MORE THAN ONE SENTENCE?

-If you continue to be mean I won't talk to you for days!

-I was the one who woke up for you!

-Tsk. Anyway, I can't eat in my own ship. They went underwater without me tonight.

-Without their Captain?!

-Nose-ya and Tanuki-ya did a puppet with my shape and left it in the cabin to see if the others are retarted enough to believe it or not.

-So they are. -you sigh resignedly. -Law, you are a bit too dramatical. Everything is fine, just go to sleep already.