Iris

07 | protect

— R O M A N ' S   P O V —

     Having Iris back with us had caused major changes to our lives. For the first time in years, our family seemed complete; happy. And for the first time in years, we all actually decided to spend time together, rather than being anywhere away from home.

Our dull house felt like home for the first time ever since we had started living within its walls.

It had only been a week since the day I met my little sister, but I already knew that she'd be the source of our happiness and the beat to our dull hearts.

I could never manage to describe how happy and relieved I felt the moment I got a call from the social care services and heard that they had finally found my little sister and that she was alive. I was out of my room within seconds, calling for my brothers like a little child, before my mind could even stop me from doing so.

And yet, I could never manage to describe the panic that overtook and numbed every part of my body the moment I heard that she was admitted to a hospital. For the first time in years, I started losing my calmness and started panicking. It seemed as though we'd lose her once again; as though the slightest bits of hope got snatched away from us.

I fought through the panic, though. I was very well aware of how I had to stay calm for my brothers. Because if anything, they were going to take it way worse than me. Especially Marcus; he had always blamed himself for what happened.

It wasn't a surprise to any of us when he locked himself within the darkness of his room, refusing to leave or to eat. And it wasn't even a surprise to see him having his first panic attack after months of not having any.

If it weren't for his bad condition that day, we would've went with the others to meet Iris.

We didn't waste a minute once he felt better, though. We both went to see her in the hospital the next day. She was asleep when we arrived; she looked too young and innocent — just like she did eleven years ago. Despite the bruises, I still managed to see how much she had resembled our mother.

And until this moment, I couldn't help but feel sad for everything we had missed. Whether it was the first step she took or the first time she spoke. We had missed seeing our little sister grow up. And we hadn't succeeded in protecting her the way we had promised ourselves we'd do.

Kate had told Elliott and Nolan about the possibilities of an abuse case after seeing all the bruises scattered over Iris' body. It made me feel guilty. A lot more than what I felt when I couldn't find my little sister — seven years ago.

Iris had said that she didn't want any of us visiting her old house or bringing her anything from there. But she was too late. I and Elliott had already been there after we heard about the fact that she could've went through lots of abuse.