TW: Mentions of abuse... :(
POV: Harry
"Harry, be my boyfriend. Please?"
Boyfriend... Fuck.
I scrambled out from underneath Louis, consequentially making him fall back a little bit. I pushed myself away, needing to distance myself.
"Harry?" His voice called, unsteady and heartbroken. Fuck. I heard the t.v. stop, assuming he'd turned it off.
"I- I just... I-" I fisted at my hair in frustration at not being able to get the right words out.
This is what I wanted. I wanted to be his boyfriend more than anything. Why am I acting like this?
"Haz, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to spring it on you like that. Shit, you don't look so good. Are you alright? Should I get you some water? Fuck, okay, I'm going to get you some water, and give you a minute of space while I'm gone, yeah? Alright? Okay, I'll be right back." I wasn't answering him, I felt out of place. There were words, I just couldn't say them. Why can't I talk right now?
I knew I was tearing up and I could see the box of tissues across the room and yet I couldn't move a muscle. My breathing was shaky and erratic and I struggled to keep myself sitting up straight. I backed up further so I was leaning against the wall, feeling like that was the only movement I could make.
Louis returned an unknown amount of time later, carrying two cups of water.
"I didn't know if you wanted a plastic cup or a glass cup so I got both." He stammered, speaking quickly and nervously. "It's so stupid like you care what kind of cup it is." He shook his head at himself, walking over quickly. He finally looked up from the cups and our eyes met. "Fuck, Harry, you're crying. Are you alright? Can I help?" He crouched down beside me, holding both cups towards me. After I failed to move to grab one, he put both down on the floor.
"S-should I go?" He said after sitting next to me for several minutes of silence. Or what would have been silence if not for my muffled and choked sobs.
"No, please don't go." I don't know how but I managed to get those words out, followed by a harder cry.
"Why are you crying Haz? I'm sorry for asking you to be my boyfriend if that's the problem. We don't have to. I just thought we should talk about it before the meeting and I guess I could've gone about it better but you looked so happy and so perfect..."
"I- I want t- to." I sniffled.
"Not if you're crying."
"No, it's not because of you. It's because of..." I trailed off, struggling to find a reason why the word boyfriend freaked me out.
Then it hit me... him.
The last time I had a "boyfriend" was him.
As if he was reading my thoughts, Louis asked, "Is it because of whatever happened with Zayn Malik?"
I almost winced at his name. Fuck. Yep, that's definitely the reason.
"Y- yeah." I breathed out, finally feeling strong enough to take a sip of the water he'd gotten for me.
"You don't have to tell me. It's okay."
"No, I w-want to tell you." I sounded somewhat stronger than I felt.
"I'm all ears." He grinned, staring at me with so much care that I felt like I could tell him anything. So that's what I did after I took a few more minutes to collect myself.
YOU ARE READING
The Bright and The Brave {l.s. au}
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