Chapter 39

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(PSA: The attached song is fitting for this chapter, but also sort of a fitting anthem for the entire book😂 So much so that I have reeeally struggled to figure out which chapter to add it to. 10/10 recommend listening lol. Enjoy this chapter!)

Nessie was still curled around me when the sun started streaming in through the window. She had fallen asleep in her skirt and blouse, and was angled awkwardly in her attempt to fit on the bed with me.

I was still sort of tired, and my eyes were still sore from my tears the night before, but I carefully pulled out of her hold and padded quietly towards the door. She liked to sleep later now, and would appreciate not being disturbed. Her eyes didn't even flutter as I softly closed the bedroom door behind me.

I found Esme in the kitchen and walked up to her, leaning into her. Both of her arms came around me as she hugged me, and then she tucked me into her side, keeping an arm looped around my chest as she mixed batter in a bowl.

"Do you feel better this morning, honey?" She asked, glancing down. I nodded, though I was still embarrassed. Despite the fact that the entire family had seen me get into trouble before, there was definitely more of a lasting shame when it happened in front of everybody, as it had the previous night.

Her arm tightened around me as if she could sense my discomfort. "I'm glad. I know how cranky you were, but that doesn't make talking back to your Uncle acceptable. Let's try to avoid that in the future, okay, Honey? If you start feeling that upset again, let one of us know before you get so irritated."

Though I nodded again, I also knew I probably would not do that. They would make me take a nap if I indicated I was grumpy. They may even permanently move my bedtime to 7:45, or maybe even 7:30, as had been discussed the night before. 

Esme pulled a little bowl of berries out of the fridge. "Come on, Sweetheart," She said, handing me the bowl. "You can help me finish breakfast. I thought you might like to make rainbow pancakes."

I had no idea what she meant by 'rainbow' pancakes, but it ended up being fun. She let me add little bits of berries to the batter- blackberries, raspberries, blueberries. There were even little white chocolate chips that she let me add, though I only got to put a few of those in. She said chocolate for breakfast wasn't the best idea, so I only got a tiny bit. 

When the pancakes were cooked, though, they had little pops of color all over. I almost didn't want to add blood on top, since it would cover up the rainbow. But I did, of course- everything tasted much yummier with blood.

My outlook was much brighter as I finished up the last of my pancakes and eggs. I smiled at Esme as she took my plate and rinsed it off in the sink. "Thank you, Mommy," I said, turning to head out of the kitchen. She called me back, though.

"Camellia, wait, Baby. I wanted to talk to you about something. Is Renesmee still asleep in your bedroom?" Esme didn't look angry, but I still felt a spike of adrenaline rush through me.

"Um... yes, ma'am. I'm not still in trouble, am I? I don't want another-"

"No, nothing like that," She assured me kindly. "But I want to go for a walk. You stay right here and I'll go get you some clothes."

Before I could finish nodding, she was gone. She had said I wasn't in trouble, but I was still nervous. Usually if she wanted to talk, she would just... talk. Wanting to talk in private usually meant I was going to be scolded. But she had promised that I wasn't in trouble, and I was positive my Mother wouldn't lie to me.

It took only a few seconds for Esme to return. She summoned me into the living room, and I was slightly embarrassed to realize Jasper and Alice were in there. Being around Jasper felt awkward after how I had treated him the night before. Still, I obediently allowed Esme to take off my nightgown and dress me for the day, trying to hide the redness in my cheeks when she needed to reach over and help me get the dress on when I couldn't find the right hole to put my head through.

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