Rejecting The Alpha | Excerpt

Elian King (1)

-It’s not what you are that’s holding you back. It’s what you think you are not-
 
An alpha. I was paired with an alpha male wolf.
 
The gender is not the problem seeing as I'm gay myself, but my mate being an alpha is. Alphas are known to be possessive, dominant, and they often seek submission from their other halves. I’m an omega, and an easy prey for other wolves in the pack. Since my brother left for beta training, the members has taken advantage of me whenever they can. I’m a personal punch bag or an errand boy for most of them.
 
Whenever they beat me up, I go to my best friend, Hailee Jones, who lives in Eureka Springs to nurse my wounds until all of them heal before going back home. The human town is thirty miles away from Blacktan Grove – the private forest our pack owns. So, in order to avoid coming into contact with Damarion, I will leave here and stay with Hailee for as long as I can. Her small apartment is enough to accommodate the two of us.
 
My wolf is really angry with me for denying him a chance to be with his mate, but he understands where I am coming from. We have been through so much hardships together and we do not need anymore. Being mated to an alpha will put me into the eyes of other strong wolves, hence making me an even bigger target. Plus, I do not want to deal with his past lovers when they find out about me. I’m aware of his sexual activities thanks to my sister and brother’s video calls every two nights.
 
I also do not want him to be worried about me every minute of every hour in the day as being weaker than a normal wolf, may bring future threats to this pack. Usually, an alpha’s mate is either a beta or gamma and in rare cases another alpha, but never an omega. So, what in the goddess name is going on? Why I of all wolves have been mated to Damarion?  A weakling like me. What can I possibly do to help the pack advance forward?
 
“Mom, I’m home,” I drawl while heading to the kitchen completely bare.
 
“Living room,” she responds like usual.
 
I take a bottle of water out of the fridge and drink it all in one go. I’m so tired from running all the way here as fast I can, which is not much. No matter how much I exercise, I remain physically weak. I used to train with the other warriors daily to strengthen myself both in wolf and human form, but had to stop because I bruised easily and almost lost my life. Since then till now, I’m treated as an inferior to some of the wolves here.
 
“For goodness sake, put on some clothes, pup,” my dad’s voice brings me out of my stupor.
 
I chuckle amusingly. “Isn’t it natural for us to roam around naked? You know, since we’re wolves.”
 
“Yeah, part wolf. So, let’s not forget about your human’s which is on display right now.”
 
“All right, old man.”
 
“Who are you calling old, boy?”
 
I smirk while stepping backwards. “Obviously the one who’s speaking to me.”
 
My dad race after me as I pass through the entrance of the kitchen and end up in the living room. Mom’s gaze on the book she is reading snaps up just as dad tackles me into a couch. I try to get out of his grasp, but fail miserably, resulting in dad successfully putting me into a headlock. This shows how underpowered I am. So, again, what is an underrated wolf like me going to do for the pack?
 
Whoever is responsible for this, should stop toying with my feelings. I know my strength and worth. I do not deserve to be the soul mate of a powerful wolf. Plus, I do not want to submit to anyone. I won’t give into the mate bond that easily. My goal for experiencing a love outside a bond is still firmly strong. I want to know what real love is. The kind that will make you or break you. Those that happens on their own and not because it was destined to be.
 
“Juan, the boy’s face is turning red. Leave him be,” my mother chastises, regarding us with a bemused look.
 
“Honey, he called me an old man, thus why I’m showing him what this old man can still do,” Dad grunts out before releasing me from his death grip.
 
Mom throw a basketball short my way as I try to normalise my breathing given that dad sort of block my airway.
 
“Phew! The old man still got it,” I croak, coughing up a little.
 
“Thank god I was here or you might have passed out from the lack of oxygen. You shouldn’t taunt your old man. You’ll bruise his ego,” Mom chides, but the amusement in her tone is crystal clear.
 
“What’s with all the commotions in here? I’m trying to take a nap and all I hear is things falling and groaning.”
 
I look up to see Joe with his mate, Alisa, beside him. They look pretty good together. It is hard to imagine them being mates though, since these two resembles Tom and Jerry most of the time.
 
Our mother heaves out a tired sigh. “Your father and brother decided to measure their strength or something.”
 
Alisa laughs at the irony of such statement, knowing too well that between my father and me, dad is stronger. This is the only thing I dislike about her. Her lack of filter. I know she cannot help it, but sometimes I wish she would try harder to tone it in front of me. I may not show it, but her honesty affects me always and my brother knows it.
 
“Babe…” Joe warns while keeping his eyes on me.
 
“I’m sorry,” she mumbles, avoiding my eyes.
 
I decide to use this opportunity to tell them about my plan. I’m aware that my brother just came home, but I really want to be away from here because if I stay, then it won’t be long before the mate bond becomes stronger and avoiding Damarion will be ten times harder. I’m already hurting, but I have to do this. Damarion deserves someone stronger to bring the pack to new heights. I don’t possess the strength and ability to do so.
 
“Hey guys, since I have turned 18, I want to go live in the human town until school ends. It will be easier for me considering, I wouldn’t have to wake up at 6 am every morning just to arrive at school before class begins,” mom and dad eye me while Joe frowns, as if I have spoken into another language.
 
“And when did you decide that?” Dad questions, all pleasantries aside.
 
"Since I decided to change school. If you’re worried about where I’ll stay, don’t be. I have a friend who lives by herself and she’ll be totally cool with having me in her apartment.”
 
“A female friend huh,” Joe teases. “What’s her name?”
 
“Hailee Jones. Her mother died last year and because of her age, child services didn’t put her into a foster home. But, she’s well taken of. So, again, you guys don’t need to sweat about me being there. It’s not like you’ll stop giving me my allowance. Plus, I can find a part-time job to help her with the expenses,” I bargain, praying to god for my parents to grant me permission. I cannot stay in the same vicinity as my mate.
 
“We’ll think about it and let you know tomorrow,” my father concludes.
 
“Thanks dad,” I smile because I know the answer already. My parents love to spoil me and my siblings will have my back definitely. But not if they know the real reason behind my leave.
 
“Okay. So, who’s cooking to-” My brother stops talking and everyone in the room turn in his direction.
 
Mom stands up and dad mimics her action. “Honey, what’s wrong?”
 
“I-I I’m not sure,” Joe stammers, “but something happened to Damarion. The warriors found him unconscious near the river. I’m going there right now.”
 
Just hearing his name and the condition he is in because of me, pull the strings of my heart painfully. My calm demeanour diminishes and anxiety fills my being. I try to breathe, but it seems like my respiratory system has shut down. I hear people talking, but I’m unable to make out the words due to the pounding of my heart in my ear. Dizziness and nausea engulf my being, effecting me to puke out my guts.
 
“Baby, breathe… slowly, in and out,” mom whispers in my ear while rubbing my back.
 
“Damarion will be fine. So take it easy, son,” my hearing becomes clearer as I follow my mother’s instruction.
 
“Dad we need to go,” Joe urges, earning himself an irritated growl. “Don’t growl at me, the alpha needs us at the pack house. And Elian, don’t worry too much. Whoever did this will be found and dealt with.”
 
The guiltiness of knowing I’m the sole culprit of my mate’s suffering eats at my core further and further more. I need to go before they know the reason behind Damarion’s predicament or else I won’t be leaving this pack ever. The wolves here take mating very seriously, and there have never been a rejection. At least not one that I know of.
 
“Mom, Dad, is it okay if I live today?”
 
My father shakes his head while mom looks at me strangely. “No, you can’t. We're still clueless about what exactly happened to Damarion, so you’ll stay here until we deem the woods safe for everybody to come and go as they want.”
 
“Right,” I sigh in defeat. I was expecting such response. After all, he’s still the second in command.
 
“Take care of yourselves and call us if anything new comes up. I would like to know the progress of Damarion. Now go,” Mom orders.
 
I sit down and put my head into the palms of my hands, thinking about how I will leave undetected. I’m sure the borders are heavily guarded by now, hoping to catch the person who has hurt their future alpha. These guys are ruthless when it comes to protecting the pack.
 
“Why are you so eager to live, Elian?” Mom pins me with an intense stare.
 
“I’ve already told you. It will be eas-”
 
“You’re good, I’ll give you that, but not enough to fool me. If you really wanted to leave, you would have done so way earlier. You have only three months of school before graduation. So, what’s the true motive behind your request, son?”
 
“Nothing, Mom.”
 
“I don’t believe you, and I’m hurt that you’re lying to my face right now.”
 
I heave out a breath. “Damarion is my mate, but I don’t want him.”
 
My mother gasps as I turn away from her and stare at the grey wall instead. I can feel her eyes on me, but I stubbornly keep mine’s where they are. I do not want to see the disappointment in them. I’m aware that what I have done is unforgivable, so no need for anyone to rub salt into the already stinging wound.
 
“Why don’t you want a mate, son?”
 
“I’m not ready for those. I’m still in school and have stuff I want to do,” I lie, but partially.
 
“Hmmm… Want to know a secret?”
 
I raise a brow, looking her straight in the eyes. “About?”
 
“Your father and I. Our union mainly.”
 
“Tell me,” she nods, giving me a smile.
 
“When I met your father, I rejected him also. I was young and naïve, thinking that I don’t need a mate to feel complete. It worked at first, but as time passed, I long to have what other mated couples had. I wanted to be cared for, so I swallowed my pride and sought out your father. He took me in without any complaints, but made me work hard to gain his trust. Since then, I strive to make him happy.”
 
I look at her with widened eyes, finding it difficult to register her words. Just a while ago I was thinking about unknown rejections, and then I find out my mom did it to my dad. I guess the apple does not fall far from the tree – like mother, like son. I wonder why they did not tell us before. Maybe mom is still ashamed of doing such a thing to my father.
 
“Wow…” I breathe out, bewildered by the revelation.
 
“Yeah… you can say that again.”
 
A small laugh passes through my lips. “So, what happened after dad welcomed you back into his life?”
 
“Well, we took things slowly and got to know one another.  I gained your father’s trust after a year. A whole damn year! It was torturous, but I endured because he completed me. He was the missing puzzle,” I hum in response.
 
So, that means that whatever I do, I will always come back to Damarion. Just because he is my fated love, I will need him in my life. I mentally think, to which my wolf growls in return.
 
“Look, I don’t know why you rejected Damarion, but if you feel like you really need to live this pack, then go. Maybe with time you’ll sort out your thoughts and come back to him or not. It all depends on you. This is your life and no one has the right to dictate how you live it, but just make sure that whatever decision you make, will not affect you in the near future. It’s important for you to keep that in mind. Happiness is one of the keys to a long fruitful life,” my mother advises, and I can’t help but feel thankful to have her by my side.
 
“Thank you, Mom. Your words means a lot to me. The truth is I’m scared. I’m an omega and a really frail one at that. I don’t get why I was mated to an alpha. It really doesn’t make sense. What am I going to do by Damarion’s side? What could I possibly give to the pack? Mom, Damarion deserves someone stronger like him, not me. Plus, I’m not sure if I’m ready to submit to an alpha. I still want pursue a love outside the bond.”
 
Mom’s sad gaze lands on me. “I get where you’re coming from, sweetie. I understand your thoughts and I’ll give you my support. Call the girl and let her know you’re coming while I pack some clothes and other necessities for a few days. The rest will be delivered later. It won’t be long before Damarion wakes up and the truth may or may not come out.”
 
“Thanks, Mom. You’re the best.”
 
I do as was told, and minutes later, I find myself closing the front door along with my mother. She asked to see me to my bike and who am I to deny her a last request? I certainly would not do such a thing. It is all because of her that I am able to execute my plan today. I need to think things thoroughly before deciding my future. If I end up back here, then it really was meant to be.
 
“Take good care of yourself, Elian. Promise to call daily and if you ever need help, don’t hesitate to ask. I’m your mother and always will be. Be careful with your wolf, you’re not in the pack anymore, so you can’t shift whenever you feel like it. Human must not know about our existent, ever. See you soon, boy,” mom embraces me into a warm hug, and I tightly hold on to her. We won’t be seeing each other for a while, so I’ll savour these moments while it last.
 
“Thanks. I love you so much, Mother. Say bye to the family for me.”
 
“I love you too, now go.”
 
I mount my black Yamaha Bike and rev up the engine before staring at my mother’s beautiful forest green eyes like my own, but the difference is hers are filled with unshed tears. I will miss her and the rest of my family truly. I mean, Joe just got back and now I’m leaving without him knowing about it. Better ready myself for a lecture from him.
 
“Bye, Mom.” I say and leave the place I always called home.