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CHAPTER FOUR

It had been a few weeks since the disaster of a birthday party and the Cullen's have, mercifully, kept their distance. I felt a bit embarrassed about how I acted, deeming it pretty childish, but at the time I just couldn't help it. They had to know I would have felt abandoned when they left me here and took my twin, they had to have known it wasn't going to be easy when we were so estranged.

I pretty much cried myself to sleep in Seth's arms that night, before waking up the next day and deciding that I wasn't going to allow them to derail my life. So my life settled back into it's routine without any disruptions, save for the spirits I see daily.

Sue is happier than ever to have both Seth and Leah back in Forks, although I have still yet to meet Leah, I assume I will meet her this Sunday because Grandma Sue decided we would have family dinner with Uncle Billy, Jacob, Seth and Leah. She was going to invite my mother, sister and father, but decided to postpone that dinner when I came home upset on my birthday.

I will say that I appreciate the gifts given to me, which I feel a bit guilty about considering how I reacted. However, I was enjoying the new paints my twins had gifted me and have been taking excellent care of the first edition books Uncle Jasper gave me. I wear the necklace from Aunt Rosalie daily, and the hiking boots from Uncle Emmett frequently. I use the journal and cookbooks I received from my grandparents almost daily as well. I had hung up the dream catcher from Jacob on my bedframe the day after my birthday. I appreciated the music sheets from my parents, the blank ones already filled up with compositions, and the only present I really had no use for were the clothes given to me by my Aunt Alice. They were really girly and fashionable, very modern. I preferred thrifted, vintage-y, dark academia style clothing.

It was a rainy day, as always in Forks. I was wearing a long chocolate brown skirt with tan boots and comfy socks and a white turtle neck. My shift at the library started in two hours but I couldn't help but wake up early to watch the rain fall through the trees.

I was sitting in one of the rocking chairs on the porch with a cup of coffee, quietly watching the rain as I got lost in my thoughts. I was so out of it that, at the sound of a car door closing, I jumped. 

Looking out, It was my sister who was getting out of what looked to be a Mercedes-Benzes. I let out a deep sigh, not really wanting to deal with this. 

She walked through the rain and up the porch with a sheepish expression. I just pursed my lips and continued rocking, taking a sip of my coffee.

"Hey Masen." she greets, her voice soft and shy.

I nod in acknowledgement, tilting my head at her in question.

She gestured to the matching rocking chair at my side, silently asking if she could sit. I watched her for a moment before nodding.

"You're up early." I noted after she had sat down.

She nods, brushing a piece of hair out of her face, I turned my head back to look out at the rain.

"Yeah, we are all kinda morning people. Seems you are too." she comments.

I shrug before taking another sip of my coffee.

"I have work in a few hours, I enjoy watching the rain, and sometimes the sunrise." 

A bit of an awkward silence settled between us as we both continued to rock in the chairs quietly.

"Why are you here Renesmee?" I ask, my voice quiet and firm.

She let out a long sigh.

"I wanted to apologize. I've felt so guilty since our birthday. We shouldn't have forced you to come. I had no clue you felt like that Masen."

Her eyes were wide, begging.

"How could I not? They left me, and took you. They never visited, barely ever called. Neither did you. I tried, for years. I called and texted and emailed and even wrote goddamn letters. So it shouldn't have been that much of a shock that I would be pissed off that you all pretty much ignored me for years, and now are acting as if it never happened. It's a shitty thing to do."

She nods, agreeing.

"You're right, it was a shitty thing to do. I can't really explain much, its not my place. I can tell you that we couldn't be around you for a reason and that it will be explained to you soon." she says.

I scoff before rolling my eyes and getting up. I pause at the door before turning back to her.

"No explanation, no matter how good, will ever satisfy me, or justify abandoning me." I tell her before I go inside, leaving her to her thoughts.