Penny for your thoughts

10

While lying in his bed, with his clothes still on, eyes heavy with all the tears that were dried by now and mind dazed by everything that happened, Jimin finds himself staring at the white ceiling, unable to move.

"I fucking love you... What was that? Why would he say that?"

His mind repeated Jungkook's words all over again, unable to forget the tone the younger used while saying those exact words...

Desperate, broken, defeated...

Why would Jungkook hurt him like that, only to tell him that he loves him the moment after?

Could you really love someone, but hurt him too?

Is that how love works?

What is this? And why does it hurt so much?

This is something he never experienced before, and sure as hell doesn't like.

"How did I get myself into this mess?!"

"Aghhh Jimin, snap out of it..."

He scolded himself mentally, but sleep didn't come easily that particular night, nor the next night, and the next, or the next.... and so on, and on, and on, until he felt too drained to even think about the younger anymore.

When the morning came, and a new ray of sunshine entered his room, his mind got occupied with Jungkook all over again.

Even if Jungkook did send a message, right after that fight, and apologized once more, Jimin doesn't wanna see him.

Not just cause he's hurt or confused, he just needed some time on his own to finally figure out what the hell is going on with him.

Why is he feeling this way? Irrational, overwhelmed, sad... simply sad, like he was missing a part of him that he just found, but got suddenly taken away from him. He worked too much, always trying to keep himself busy, but he never went to the cafeteria to grab lunch, instead he ate it in his office. He didn't go to check upon the workers like he usually does, he asked Kangdae to do that for him, and all of that seemed to do its purpose.

After two weeks of successfully dodging the younger, he decides to go to Busan, to pay an unannounced visit to his family and hopefully distract his still heavy mind.

He kind of wanted to see their reaction when he told them that he passed all the exams that he had left, and the two that he failed, he would just study harder and finish them in September. He really felt proud of himself cause his grades are amazing, and he really accomplished a lot at work too. A few new suppliers made a deal with them and it was all cause of Jimin and his charm to negotiate good conditions for both sides.

While filling the backpack with some clothes, he thought about the younger and what he's been doing these past few weeks.

"Does he miss me?"

"Is he dying to see me?"

"Are there some new manga that he's reading?"

He glanced at his phone, and looked at the last messages he shared with Jungkook. The last one was a week ago. Maybe the younger figured out how it's better to just leave things as they are, and had accepted the fact that Jimin needed some time alone.

Jungkook

I really am sorry hyung. It was never my intention to hurt you... You know how I feel about you... I hope you can forgive me, and that we can talk about this. Give me a chance please.

Jungkook

I'm sorry. I miss you.

Jungkook