↱THAT'S ME IN THE SPOTLIGHT↲ ⇾larry stylinson⇽

Chapter 23

Welcome back~

Let's get back into it! 

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Louis was assigned to the tour bus for a ten - hour overight trip to a small town in Arkansas . Along with as a handful of the crew , Harry was on the bus with him . He'd sat next to Louis in one of the conventional bus seats on the upper level , saying , " I don't sleep well in the bus . Looking forward to sleeping next to you tomorrow night . " Louis looked over his shoulder -a makeup artist had headphones blasting and a cameraman was asleep with his slack face pressed against the window . " Till come to your room , okay . No more sneaking out of yours " If you're smart enough to make a room look used , I'm sure I am too . " Hany said with a frown on his face . " I know . " Louis assured him . I just don't want you to have to worry about it . So I'll come to yours , oui ? But if you ever want some time by yourself , just to chill out - Til sleep in my own room . I won't be offended . " Harry rolled his eyes . " You know everything's about six million times better with you around , yeah Louis pressed his lips together to keep from smiling too big . " Yeah , I know . " " I am worried . " Harry said after a moment . " Not about rooms , about . some people who watch the show . The ones who are really paying attention to me . At the live show you missed , a couple of audience members had these signs . They stopped holding them up pretty quickly . or maybe someone took them off them . One said gay rights and one said " Support Love ... but then smaller , down the bottom - ' Harry for equality , equality for Harry . What's that mean , equality for Harry ! " We can't know for sure . " Louis said carefully , not wanting to let on how it worried him . " We can only guess . " Harry sighed . " T've already guessed . They think I'm gay . I've seen similar stuff on Twitter . Some worse stuff . There's not much of it but ... a few people really think I'm gay . " He said it so sadly that Louis had to give his hand a squeeze . " And they'd be correct , " he added helplessly " It's not exactly an insult , if it's coming from people who are supporting your Louis tried . " How would they even know I am - you know ... say , thought Harry asked . Louis just shrugged . He didn't understand the Modem Missionary - watching generation even half as well as Harry did . He didn't know what they'd look for whatever Louis had normally looked for , he hadn't seen it in Hany . He'd seen something brand new " Well , it's not something I need right now . " Harry said binerly . then let out a low laugh . " Or maybe it is . Maybe the whole world should just find out and then I can lose the show and lose my family and just get on with whatever's left . " Louis ran his thumb over Harry's hand , ready to drop it the second he heard movement from someone in the bus . " There will be lots left for you . Maybe the people with the signs aren't helping like they think they are , but it's something , isn't it ? It shows that there's people out there who'll support you . " Harry just sniffed and rubbed at his nose , looking tired . " Hey , mon petit , you're sleepy . " Louis said , letting go of Harry's hand . " Je suis ... not fatigué , " Harry quietly argued , a cheeky smirk on his face . " Non , t'es tres fatigué . Trop fatigue ! " Louis playfully poked him in his dimple . " I know you , I can tell . Go down and score yourself a good bunk , okay . " Harry stood up , balancing himself with a hand on the window . " Are you coming down ? " In a bit . " Louis was the last to retire out of anyone on the bus , taking the one spare bunk left . He had almost fallen asleep when something hit his shoulder . Tuming on the reading - light , he realised it was a shoe . A fucking shoe . He yanked back his curtain . Harry's head was hanging out of the top bunk opposite Louis ' , waiting . When he saw Louis he pouted and pulled up the middle of his curtain , pointing miserably at the erection in his loose pyjama pants . Louis furiously gestured for Harry to put his curtain down - the kid was insane , Louis hadn't even seen Harry watching him get in . He quickly drew his own curtain shut again too , fishing his phone out of the small wall - pocket - he also procured someone's old candy bar wrapper - life on the tour bus . Magnifique . Louis quickly typed out a message to Harry . Deal with it yourself . So I have permission , then ? :) Harry sent back . It's not wrong , Harry . Louis replied , trying to be patient . You don't need permission to do it . But you also don't really need to do it on a bus with that guy who holds the fluffy microphone's pole thing sleeping soundly below you , hm ? Harry didn't reply for a few minutes , so Louis sighed and sent , Yes . You have permission . Not five minutes later , Louis began to hear faster breathing coming from Harry's bunk . He rolled his eyes and then closed them , trying to fall asleep - but when Louis heard Harry gasp . his dick twitched in his pants . He then kept his ears pricked up and when he caught the faintest of muffled whimpers , his own hand found its way down , pushing the heel of his palm against himself . Louis fumbled for his phone , and sent : Mon bon garcon , you stay quiet , okay ? You're being so good . Are you wearing underwear ? Harry texted back . Was that supposed to be dirty - talk ? Louis couldn't help grinning , typing one - handed as he continued to push at himself through his pants . I'm not wearing any , just my pyjama pants . Need something to come into . There were tissues and toilet paper on the bus , probably empty old water bottles too , but fuck , it was a hot idea - and where had Harry even got it from ? Quick , Harry added . Louis shimmied out of his pants , pulled off his underwear , and poked his head out the bunk , nervously glancing to see if anyone else was up . Harry's head popped out too , hand expectant . Louis balled up his dark purple Prada underwear and threw it over . It wasn't a great toss and for a split second Louis ' heart jumped into his throat , thinking Harry would miss it , but Harry was surprisingly athletic and quickly leant forward , grabbing them . Louis drew his curtain again and settled back down in his bunk feeling paralysed , now lying there naked and decidedly pretending he was not hard . The only thing on his mind was Harry . Harry's ragged breath , his big cock , his long fingers now wrapped around bunched - up fabric as he thrust his hips up into his fist . Louis could still hear him , quick gasps pushed out of his mouth , short inhalations catching in his mouth , the rhythmic crinkle of bedsheets below him . Louis just prayed everyone else was fast asleep , or at least wouldn't distinguish the sounds when they didn't know to listen for them . Soon , Louis heard two high , frantic , strangled squeaks , and knew Harry had come . Louis grit his teeth and wrestled his pants back on - he was thirty - two for fuck's sake , far too dignified to jerk off on a stuffy bus that a portion of his coworkers were on . Took a photo for you ... Harry sent to Louis . Panic bumed in Louis ' chest as he quickly typed back , No , don't send it . What he was doing with Harry was one thing , but he was too smart to keep obviously personal photos of Harry on his phone - especially photos of that calibre . He also was in no way a saint and needed to make Harry decide against it now - because if Harry tried again , Louis would probably say yes . Not of me , you ' con ' . I'm not stupid , Harry sent back . Louis heard a giggle come from Harry's bunk . Don't call me an idiot . Louis replied , laughing quietly too . You're not even using it right . Con con con con ! Harry sent , with a wink emoji . A moment later a photo came through , and Louis was relieved to see no part of Harry's body in it . It was Louis ' Prada underwear in a small crumpled heap on the mattress of Harry's bunk , the harsh light of the phone's flash illuminating the splatter of his come in a obscene way . Louis didn't sleep a wink the rest of the bus trip . As soon as they arrived and checked into a small hotel the following morning , Harry left again to film . Louis had to bite his tongue to keep himself from asking . " You are going ahead with the skit then ? " He let Harry go . It was his choice , not Louis ' . A company car took Harry to the makeshift set . In the small town , he'd expected something humble , but it was just as fancy as any other set he'd been on for the show ; a simple scout hall on the outside , but the inside was made to look like a very glamorous ballroom - at least half of it was , before the set promptly dropped off back into plain hall where the crew were setting up cameras and lights . Harry saw one of the wardrobe assistants milling about a clothes rack , looking smug - probably pleased that she was in charge , with Louis off set for the day - the second time in not too long , Harry realised , which was a scary trend to be forming . When Harry saw Jeremy , he waved at him . Jeremy barely paid any attention . Harry walked over to him , brushing off the hairdresser that tried to pull him over . " I don't want to do this , " Harry said feebly . " What ? " Jeremy said , more focused on looking over the set than at Harry . " I don't want to do this , " Harry said , a little louder this time . This skit . I don't want to do it . " Jeremy did look down at Harry now . " Is this Louis Tomlinson's influence ? " Harry figured his best bet was cluelessness . " What ? I haven't gone over to wardrobe yet , I haven't seen him . " Jeremy just looked at him . Harry felt about three inches tall . " It's not very Christian to paint other people in a bad light , " Harry said . It gave him confidence to articulate it like that he couldn't predict Jeremy's response , but if God was on Harry's side , who could really be against him ? " The script plays on stereotypes . It's not something I believe in doing . Not any more . " Jeremy's eyes widened . " Harry , you can't tell me this at the last minute . You wrote the script with me , there's nothing bad in it . Look around you . There's forty - three people on set here today . another twenty - three actors . You'll be letting them all down . You made a commitment . " Twenty - three actors , Harry pondered . " Get one of the extras to do it . " He took a deep breath . " I'm not going to be in it . " " The show's been successful . " Jeremy acknowledged . " I'm very proud of how well it's doing and how the audience response to you has been . That doesn't mean you get to have a diva moment , Harry . You're under contract . Go get your hair and makeup done , and get into costume . We're starting to film in an hour and a half . " " No. " " No ? " Jeremy repeated , incredulous . " Get one of the extras to do it . " Harry repeated . " That's nice , isn't it ? Giving them an opportunity ? I'm under contract to be the Modern Missionary . I don't think a good Christian missionary would do this skit . We'd be isolating a whole group of people rather than reaching out to them . " Jeremy looked furious , but Harry had to keep going before he let himself back down . " I'll lose my voice , " he threatened . " I'll lose my voice and I won't be able to film and then we - not just me , you too - will have wasted everyone's time . Just pick one of the extras to learn my lines . " " Right , " Jeremy said harshly . " I'm sure they'll appreciate the opportunity , that you feel you're so high above . I'm incredibly disappointed in you . I'm going to be calling your parents tonight . " " I'm sorry to disappoint you , " Harry said . " Maybe you shouldn't try to make me film bad things . " " There's nothing bad in this skit , Harry . " " Maybe you think so . But I won't do anything I don't believe in . " Jeremy's face tightened for just a split - second , clenching his jaw . " I want you off the set , now . Go back to the hotel . I'm cancelling your interviews for tomorrow as well , until you get out of this mood . " " You're punishing me ? " Harry clarified . " I'm giving you a day off to sort your head out , " Jeremy worded carefully . " I suggest you make time to call your parents tomorrow , or call Father Alan from your church . You need to get your head out of the clouds and your feet back on the ground . You're not Brad Pitt . I'm going to go talk to the actors , and when I get back , I don't want you on my set . Understand ? " My set , he'd said . Not ' the set ' any more . " Yes , " Harry said , feeling guilty - but empowered , too . " I want you to have a good , hard think about your behaviour today , Harry . I expect you back on set and at the top of your game at the next shoot . It's at a farm , you remember ? Big crew required . You'll be letting down a lot more people if you miss that one . " " I won't miss that one , it's ... " Harry started to protest , but he let himself trail off - Jeremy had angrily stormed away before Harry could even finish . Louis was surprised when Harry came back within the hour that morning , knocking on his hotel room and slipping in before Louis had even fully opened the door . " I need to talk to you . " Harry announced , shutting the door . " Okay , Curly . " Louis ruffled Harry's hair . " Do you want something to eat ? " " No , " Harry said . " Grabbed a muffin from the craft services table before I left . I didn't do the skit . " " I see that . " Louis smiled , walking back into the room . " I got to set and told Jeremy I wasn't doing it , " Harry said as he followed him . Louis just sat on the bed , but Harry flopped straight down onto his back . " How did he take it ? " " He's cancelled my interviews tomorrow . " " What the fuck ? " Louis said too loudly , absolutely amazed . " They weren't big TV ones or anything , just radio . " Harry kicked off his shoe harder then necessary " Mon petit , " Louis said , gently taking Harry's other shoe off him . " You okay ? " " I can't effing do anything right , " Harry muttered , a brave grimace on his face . " You do everything right . " " No , I really don't do anything right . That's what I have to talk to you about . " " Okay . " Louis lay down next to Harry , turning on his side to face him . " So , I talked to Zayn - I apologised to Zayn , and he reminded me that I probably owe you an apology too . " Harry shut his eyes and ducked his head down , hiding . Louis put one of his hands under Harry's chin , and Harry opened his eyes again , gaze unfocused somewhere at Louis ' chest . " I kept saying like , ' no homo ' to you , and worse things than that too . " " You've stopped , " Louis acknowledged . " T'm really glad about that . " " I kept saying I'm not gay . When I was doing , like ... really gay things with you . That can't have been nice to hear . " " It was okay . You were confused . " " It wasn't okay . " Harry's pale green eyes looked up at Louis . " Believe it or not , I understand you . " " You do ? " Louis wanted to sound self - assured ... but Harry's look was far too knowing . " I don't think you want to admit that things hurt you . To yourself , or to anyone else . When you got back from France , you never said you were missing your family . But you must have been . It must suck being so far away . And hearing me keep saying I wasn't gay must have really sucked . I think you may be told me that you didn't like it one time . Just once . That's it . " Louis pressed his lips together , afraid to open his mouth . " Zayn says you don't take shit from anybody . Anybody . And I've seen it , with the people we work with . If they get even a toe out of line , you make them take a whole step back . Except you went easy on me . " " I guess , " Louis admitted . " It was more than I deserved , and I kept fucking up basically every second chance you gave me . I'm sorry . " " Merci . " Louis said . " See , that's what I mean , " Harry said casually . " You sort of ... hide sometimes . You speak French , or you don't admit that something hurts you . " " Right . " Louis said . " Well , thank you , in English . That really means a lot to me . " " You know it was a lie , right ? " Harry asked . " That ' I'm not gay ? I've always been gay . " " Oh ? " Louis was surprised to hear Harry say it - pleasantly surprised . " You're special . " Harry winked . " But you're not that special . I was always gay , I was gay way before I met you . I just ... didn't let myself be . Until you came along , and you showed me that it's okay . It's fine to be that way . It's all still really new and really , really scary to me but I should have thought more about how what I said would affect you . " Harry took Louis ' hand and pulled it up to his lips , kissing his fingers . " I'm sorry . " " Harry , " Louis whined stupidly in two draw - out syllables , not knowing what else to say . " Thank you . " " Do you know how scared I am ? " Harry said . Louis properly thought about the question . " I don't think I've ever had to be afraid about my sexuality in the way you are . I've been very lucky . I can imagine what it's like for you , though . You have a lot to lose . "