Liar, Liar

5: Veritaserum and Embarrassment

For some reason, his words made me nervous. "I'm the only student in Applicable Potions?" I asked, my voice barely below a whisper.

"Yes," he responded, his gaze unwavering.

I shifted in my seat, feeling rather awkward. Really, no students wanted to go into potions after their last year? Ridiculous.

"Indeed," Snape said, making me jump from my seat.

"Excuse me?" I asked. "D-did you just-" I stuttered. "Read my mind?"

He took a step toward me, his cape parting slightly as he did so. "I heard it," he replied. "You have exceedingly loud thoughts, Miss Agoria."

My cheeks turned pink at the prospect of what this may mean. I tried to stop myself from thinking. Before I could ask how it was possible, Snape went back to his desk.

"As you are the only pupil in this class, I obviously can not teach you in the manner of a general class. Therefore, we will be taking an ... alternative approach to ensure that you receive all of the schooling which you require," he explained, his voice tensing.

In front of me sat a textbook that no one else in the previous class had. It was old and worn, with Fundamentals of Advanced Potions etched onto the cover. Curiously, I flipped it open.

"You will read in silence today."

I started on the first page, my quill and parchment at the ready. I tried to focus on my book, but was unnerved by the lack of pupils in the room. I tapped my quill against my lips. It was impossible to focus. The words just kept repeating themselves over and over.

"It's quite a simple topic, I'd expect you, of all people, a Ravenclaw, to understand the effects of brewing an incorrect dose of Veritaserum," he scoffed, noticing that I've been on the same page for a long time.

"It's- it's hard to focus," I stammered, intimidated. I immediately regretted my words, cringing in my mind once I realized how they sounded.

Snape, however, did not let this response go unnoticed. "Perhaps you'd like to share what may be distracting you?" He tilted his head, his eyes peering down at me condescendingly. "What problems could an insolent little girl who can't even tell me the effects of an incorrectly brewed Veritaserum have?"

I gulped, my face turning white. His eyes pierced mine as he cocked his head. "Nothing, sir," I replied. I went back to my book; however, as I flipped absentmindedly through the pages, I couldn't stop thinking about his words. He was right, I was a Ravenclaw who didn't even know what the hell I was doing. What was I even doing in potions? He was right, he was right, I am such an insolent-

"Enough!" His voice boomed. "Focus."

I looked up, stressed out of my mind. Was he listening to my thoughts again?

"Stop chewing your quill. It's disgusting," he spat. "You may leave."

Gulping, I jumped out of my seat and ran out the door, throwing my textbook and quill into my bag as I did so. Desperate to be out of that classroom. I just wanted to crawl into bed. Embarrassed of my thoughts yesterday, embarrassed of my unfocused mind, my incompetence. Just like he said. I had let Malfoy trap me. I was incompetent, I couldn't think for myself, I wasn't going to get a ministry job, not with this snake on my forearm, rattling, prickling my skin, dancing on my arm. Begging to be seen, to be admired. Loathing the way I kept it hidden.

I buried my head in my hands, leaning against the wall, a few feet from Snape's classroom. I didn't know where to go. The halls were empty. Riss was in class, and I didn't have anyone else to turn to. I let myself slide against the wall to the ground, trying not to sob into my hands. It was all gone, ruined. Lucius had ruined my life with that spell, and Draco had just let it happen. He had watched, had brought me to his father. Mordsmorde... it echoed through my head. His spell. Voldemort's, etching him into my arm forever. A servant. I am a servant.

"It wasn't your fault," a voice above me boomed. Startles, I jumped up, wiping my eyes. Snape stood in front of me, looking down.

"I'-I'm sorry, Sir?" I asked.

"It wasn't your fault," he gestured to my left arm, which I was clutching as if my life depended on it. "You trusted him. It wasn't your fault."

I peered up at him, not knowing what to say. "How did you know?" I asked hoarsely.

He rubbed his temples. "Your thoughts can be very loud."

I didn't know what to say about this, so I didn't say anything.

And then, I opened my mouth, and said possibly the stupidest thing I could have said: "How did you become one?" It just burst out of my mouth.

His face darkened, as if it was a match that had been blown out. "Insolent girl. Get out of my sight," he sneered.

My mouth parted. "But-"

He turned on his heel, striding back into his classroom, his door slamming shut behind him.

Confused and slightly hurt, I ran toward the Ravenclaw dormitory. I hope no one sees me like this, I prayed. Oh Merlin, please-

As if Merlin himself was mocking me, I turned the corner and ran into Draco Malfoy. Literally. Bumping into his broad shoulders, I fell backwards. Onto my butt.