Random things (Azur lane included)

.

(Yes the art is mine. The 'Cat' is by my friend. Shoutout to you)

Hi guys. I've been wanting to write this thanks somewhere, but there hasn't really been anywhere to put it. I've been thinking about doing it in here, but I've decided to put it off. 

Until now. 

I don't know how to start this, so I guess I won't. 

First off, we all know 2020 and so far 2021 have sucked. But, for some people, more than others. I'm not stating the reason, but you can easily find it out yourself.

And, I guess that's when it turned to me. 

I don't know if I've said this anywhere, but I have had a history with depression. Near the beginning of 2020. I think I'm getting a few more 'Oooooooh. I understand now.'

At the time, I didn't know Wattpad. But, then I was introduced to it my someone close. 

By then, my depression had faded away. I wasn't thinking about it. 

But then, I think a few weeks ago, I had a thought. And, it was a weird one. 

It was a suicide death. 

That's when my depression flared up. I stopped wanting to do things. I stopped doing things. I stopped a lot of things. But, two things helped. 

One, was music. I can't say how much it helped me. 

But, then second was Wattpad. I had started the 'A War With Warspite' I think onw or two recently. 

I loved doing things that educated my mind but was also fun. 

And, still now I would classify myself as depressed. 

Anything could happen. 

If you know me personally, first off, I'm sorry. Sorry for not telling you. 

But, you might be like: Oh, he's such a cheerful guy! He's friendly and doesn't care about too much. 

That's because I've been keeping it inside me. 

I would say probably the only real feelings I like to display and do would be: Happiness, frustration, energized and sleepiness. 

But, I'm also sad, lonely, disappointed, tired, depressed, and much much more. 

If you know me personally, you might think that I need approaching. 

I don't. 

I think the way I fixed it before was thinking about it. Finding something new that I loved. 

But, I think I'm out. 

I don't know where this will take me. 

I've made something like this before on my youtube channel, but then deleted it a week or two after. 

It didn't matter. 

People that I know saw it. 

I guess it didn't seem I was depressed. 

One of them even mentioned it a few days ago. 

And, by the slim chance your reading this: There could be a part two. 

But, I don't think its a video you want to watch. 

Now, just to be clear, this isn't here to alarm you. This is here for explanation. 

I hate personal approaches, but you can talk to me about it here. 

I will most likely respond. 

If you are really concerned, then just know that your already doing so much. Just by reading this, I know that you know what's happening in my life. 

And, I thank you for it. 

-SneakyChilli