#9 Not Done Talking

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Gazing at the flock of swans flying by, I shyly smile to myself and nibble on my fingernails. I can't get the feeling out of me. I can't get the memory out of me. I can't get.... Why is this beginning to sound like an Elvis song?

I woke up on top of him on the couch. The feeling of his hardcore body was sooo good. Imagine having that insane male body all to me, and only me, to touch.

I stop walking.

I stop giggling.

I get serious, thinking about what's happening to me — how I'm getting swept away like some curbside dirt by a street sweeper. 

Is Chris going to be mine? Or is he playing with me? Or maybe he treats Jennifer like this, too?

What should I do? Should I keep my wall up? Or should I starting thinking names for our kids?

Ugh... IT'S SO CONFUSING!

I start pounding the footpath with my feet to take out my frustration.

I think Michael or Michelle would be good for our first kid.

I pound the footpath harder.

Someone rudely grabs my arm and spins me around. I see their mouth move, and take off my earphones that are blasting rock music at an above the acceptable audio level for healthy hearing.

"What?" I ask.

"What happened last night?" Jennifer asks.

I don't mind the question, but her tone is rubbing me the wrong way. Not to mention I was just thinking about her — how she's ruining my chances with both Chris and Joe.

If I want Joe, Joe wants Jennifer. If I want Chris, Jennifer wants Chris.

She should just declare who she wants for a mate already.

But then again, I probably should do something like that, too, and I haven't yet.

"I was sleepwalking. Ended up on the highway. Chris saved me from getting hit by a truck."

Her lips make an O shape and the wrinkles between her brows disappear. "Is that so..." she says to herself.

"Why did you ask? Did I wake you up while sleepwalking?"

"No. I didn't know when you left. I heard you both entering in the early morning."

So she thought she could just ask me what we were up to? I didn't say anything even when I saw her and Chris kissing! I didn't grab her on the street and ask what happened in the kitchen that day!

Maybe I shouldn't be this naive in life.

Just then, a familiar motorbike, ridden by a familiar figure, stops by our side. "Hey, girls," Joe says, giving us that thousand watt smile. He's like an ice cream truck, wherever he parks he puts smiles on everyone's faces there.

"Are you heading home? Can you give me a lift?" Jennifer quickly says even before I could say a hey back to Joe.

My jaw drops, and Joe looks hesitantly at her. Jennifer then turns to me and says, "Oh, you don't mind, do you? You usually take the bus, right? I'd to let my friend borrow my car today."

SO? I CAN USE A LIFT, TOO, YOU KNOW! THAT TOO WITH JOE!

"Sure. I don't mind."

Jennifer puts on a grin and climbs up behind Joe in no time. She could at least pretend to be reluctant out of courtesy.

"You sure? I'll come back for you." Joe says.

And in that moment, I see Jennifer's smile falter. She looks... hurt?

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