Our Friend, Ted - Second Draft

Chapter 3 - Josh

Jimmy called me and said he was in town for a few days and wanted to hit the city, so I couldn’t say no.

Even now, Jimmy is the guy who doesn’t take no. I think his LinkedIn profile says “Persistent,” but you can put only so much of a positive spin on a thing.

Jimmy was my best friend since elementary school, even though he’s still the type of guy you just shake your head at when he tells you tales of his mischief.

That’s how I found myself on a Friday night sitting in Eddie’s pool hall with people who don’t give as much of a shit. Jimmy’s type of place.

And there I was, still dressed up in my suit — I had loosened my tie and unbuttoned my top button in hopes to fit in a little bit better. Needless to say it wasn’t working — the obvious thing that wasn’t like all the others.

Even Jimmy entered, his dark jet black hair slicked back, dressed in Wrangler jeans and a cheesy, one-liner T-shirt.

Thanks for that heads up there, old Jimmy boy.

“You should take you coat off at least,” he said, as he walked up to me sitting at the bar, already signaling the tender to order his beer. “You can hang it over there.”

He pointed to a coat rack that hung over in the corner, nestled in by a pool table that had three burly 300-hundred-plus pound men busting each other with jocularity.

The rackhad just five pegs for a bar full of about forty people. All the pegs were taken, clothes strewn about and piled on top of each other. Except for that last peg. The one that held a lonely white, Marilyn Monroe-esque wig.

Um, yeah.

“No, I’m good,” I said. “Besides, if I get shit faced wasted — (Just so you know, this wasn’t going to happen. I just didn’t want to leave my stuff unguarded. But what’s the best way to say that in this place?) — I want to be able to leave and make sure I have everything with me.”

“Suit yourself,” he said, and snickered to himself as he grabbed a few quarters, grabbed me and reached to rack up the balls on the pool table.

I thought I would do just that, despite the fact that several of the bikers and other regulars were continuing to look my way and take in a hearty guffaw to themselves.

“So you know Tracy is traveling back to her family in Kansas City,” Jimmy said. “So I figured I’d look you up and see what you’re doing now that college is a thing of the past. Can you believe it?” He extended the pool cue to the side in an incredulous extension of his body.

“I know. It’s so weird to think about going to work and coming home and watching TV instead of going to classes and everything. I’m not sure I’ll ever get used to it. So how are you and the girlfriend doing?”

“Tracy is pretty good. We’re starting to look at apartments to move in together, and she’s ecstatic. I think it’s going to be pretty weird to live with her.”

“But you’re looking forward to it, right?”

“Oh, yeah, no doubt. It’s just being able to have sex any time I want. Not having to worry about whether parents or brothers or sisters or roommates are home. Man, it’s just going to be something I’m not used to.”

Good ol’ Jimmy. He never disappoints.

I should have figured he would say something like that. I mean, he is the guy who will treat his girlfriend right, hold doors open, pay for meals, act like a nice guy, but then at heart he is the guy who will say things like this. Things that would clearly get him slapped if any woman was a part of the conversation.

“How about you? Any ladies lighting up the fires inside Josh recently?”

Ugh. Does he really have to phrase questions like that?

“Naw. Nothing going on on that part of my life. I’ve been really focusing on work, getting to know a few guys there. Otherwise I’ve been trying to just get used the transition. That’s really been the hard part.”

“I don’t know man. The way I hear you talking, it sounds like you’re never going to get a girlfriend. You know, I know I live up in Milwaukee, but Tracy has a great looking blonde friend who is so tired of the guys up there.

“I swear, every time she comes over she’s like ‘Milwaukee guys suck, Milwaukee guys this, Milwaukee guys that.’ Man, I can never get her to shut up about it. I bet she’s the type of chick who would love a little Chicago action.”

“Thanks, I appreciate it,” I said. “I’ll keep it in mind, but I think a long-distance relationship is not what I need right now. It’s tough enough to get out and do things with people in Chicago. To be separated by a state line, I’m just not sure that’s going to work right now.”

“I don’t know. She’s really super cute. I mean, I would totally date her if I weren’t dating Tracy already.”

Oh, thanks for that vote of confidence there, Jimmy. Can you feel me rolling my eyes at him right now?

No? Well, I’m rolling my eyes at him right now.

“I’ll let you know if I change my mind. But I don’t think I will unless she moves to Chicago area or something like that.”

“Suit yourself,” and he gave me that hearty laugh again, as the sweat oozed out of my business attire.

Sigh.