Brotherly Love

34 * I Don't Deserve It

©JRF2016

Daryl had been staying with me ever since I told him about Michael. He wouldn't let me out of his sight. I grabbed the knob on the front door to head outside, "Where are you goin'?" Daryl asked, "What are you gonna do?" I let my hand fall by my side and hung my head. "I really don't know, Dee," I let out a big sigh, "I want a change in scenery. I'm not ready to be around anybody yet but I just need to get out for a while."

"You need me to go with ya. Keep everybody away?" I nodded my head as I turned to look at him and gave him a forced smile before walking out the door. To the left was Rick's place and he was standing outside the door with Beth and Carol. I quickly turned to the right and walked around the corner hoping that they didn't see me. Just as I was about to turn that corner though I heard Rick shout, "Roxanne!" I didn't turn around but I picked up my pace and once I was out of sight I ducked behind a bush. I held my breath trying to be extra quiet. As Rick came up and stood in front of that same bush I was hiding in, I brought my hand up to my mouth to make sure I made no sound. He looked around for a minute before turning and heading back to Beth and Carol. I stepped out from the bush and started walking down the backside of our building trying hard to get my head straight.

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I know Roxanne heard me calling her and I know she came around the corner but where'd she disappear to so fast? I heard a rustle in the bush behind me and I turned quickly to see what it was. I noticed someone hiding and I reached for my pistol when I noticed her the bracelet on her wrist. She was hiding from me. She obviously didn't want to talk to me so I just pretended that I didn't see anything and walked back toward Carol and Beth. I stopped at her door when I noticed it open and Daryl sitting inside. I decided to stop and talk to him instead. "Hey," I said as I poked my head inside the door, "What're you up to?"

"Just hangin' out til Rox gets back."

"Where'd she go?"

"Boy, you're full o' questions today, huh? She needed some air, she just went for a little walk." I shuffled back and forth on my feet staring down at the floor. "But you kinda already knew where she was didn't ya?" I nodded my head before I spoke. "I saw her coming out the door and I yelled for her, ya know thinking she might be ready to talk to me again and she took off around the corner. She hid from me."

"Don't worry too much about my baby sister, she's gettin' better but she still just needs some more time."

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Daryl was the one that had promised to come back for me but Merle was the one that showed back up. Two days after the Michael incident, two days after pop had ruined the rest of my life, two days after he had dragged me back into this hell hole. He had been drinking as usual when I heard the door slam and his truck back out of the driveway. He was finally gone, now was my chance. I grabbed my backpack and started throwing some clothes in it. I slid on my unlaced combat boots and ran out of my bedroom door without tying them. I didn't have time for those small details. I wanted to be out of this house and long gone before the son of a bitch got back. I swung the door wide open not slowing down at all until I crashed into Merle's broad chest. "Hey little girl," he said smiling at me, "Whatcha in such a hurry for?" I couldn't answer I just burst into tears at the sight of him. He grabbed a hold of me and pulled me into one of his rare hugs. "Easy does it, girlie. Big brother Merle's here now." I managed to get out through my sobbing that I wanted to get out of here and he climbed on his bike patting the seat behind himself for me to get on too. He drove for a while before pulling in front of a small trailer. We both hopped off the bike as a red head came bursting out of the door of that trailer. She looked mad as she glared at me, "What the hell Merle Dixon? It wasn't bad enough that people are spreadin' rumors, you gotta actually bring some little hussy into my house!" Merle was mad now as he got in her face, "That's my baby sister, bitch. Don't you ever say anything about her like that again!" The woman's face immediately fell and she looked apologetic now. She walked over to me and hugged me tightly, "So you're the infamous Roxanne? Merle talks about his little sister all the time, and now I finally get to meet you. Come on in." I looked at Merle who just had his typical smirk on his face. I fell back behind her so I could talk to my oldest brother. "Who the hell is she bro?"