Daddy [mxm]

16

I always thought trying on suits for Bret's wedding would feel like a happier occasion.

But when Bret steps in close behind me to wrap the tie around my neck and knot it expertly, the feeling is more like cognitive dissonance. It's like I woke up in someone else's body, in a strange town I don't recognize. Nothing in the world is the same after the dizzying whirl of events in the last few days.

Bret positions the tie around my shoulders and adjusts it until the tip of the wide end is about a foot below the narrow end.

I try and fail to meet his eyes in the mirror. The man really said he wanted to kiss me. It wasn't an offering of comfort? No, he seemed into it.

What is up with him? What is up with me?

Bret crosses the wide end of the tie over the narrow, brings the wide end back under, and crosses it a couple more times with deft fingers.

"Sorry I'm so clueless. I never wear these..." I chuckle, trying to keep things light.

"It's okay." His tone is flat, without a hint of levity. That's it? Not even a touch of his personal brand of humour?

I try to focus on what he's doing, storing the procedure away for later. Pull up through the neck loop. Fold the wide tip under itself and pull it up through the loop at my collar...

"Remember when I pretended to kiss you in high-school?" I blurt, immediately following this up with a mental facepalm and an inward, fuck!

Bret's lips twitch.

"You trying to make me feel better?" He murmurs, focusing intently on the task at hand. "Listen, I wasn't trying to take advantage of your vulnerability or anything..." I've now got a horizontal loop at the front of my tie, through which Bret inserts the wide end and pulls.

"No, man-"

"I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable."

"You didn't! I was just remembering that fake kiss in high-school, back when we were kids. You were so creeped out."

Bret starts pinching the sides of the tie just below the front knot, trying to make a dimple.

There's the smile.

"I was like, what the fuck, should I go violent?" He chuckles.

He pulls the wide end to tighten the tie, gives the knot a final pinch to help the dimple stay in place, and steps back.

I was a scrawny boy in high-school, no muscle tone, plagued by the occasional breakout. And I would get harassed by the boys in the year above me.

Yo, pretty boy, I still remember Jake Donaldson calling after me on my way to the bus, his delinquent friends flanking him. We're not sure you're really a boy. Can we check? He'd grope himself mockingly.

The next day, we were in the library and I saw him walk in. So I found Bret, pushed him against a bookshelf, and pretended to kiss him on the mouth, just kind of mashing our faces together. Nobody fucked with Bret in those days. He was the biggest guy in our grade back then - in the whole school, probably.

Dude, my best friend had gawked.

Shut up. I only pretended to kiss you 'cause Jake's been bothering me.

You could've kissed literally anyone else.

I remember frowning and asking, puzzled, why would I kiss someone else when you're there?

The following week was awkward but harassment-free. Jake was an idiot, but not stupid enough or desperate enough to challenge Bret. Bret was sullen, probably frustrated because chicks weren't hitting on him as much anymore.