Always

Chapter 18

Peeta P.O.V.

Katniss's hand drops off my back as she stares at me and considers what I've just said.

"But there are no more Games, Peeta," Katniss says, trying to cheer me up.

"I know," I reply. "But they've still turned me into something I'm not." She can't deny that.

"We've all been turned into something that we're not," she says quietly. "Look at me. First volunteer, girl on fire, Mockingjay. I was never really any of those things. I was always just Katniss Everdeen. I just symbolized those things." I look at her and smile.

"You always know what to say," I tell her as I lean over and kiss her.

"You're the one that's good with words," she says. I laugh a little.

"Except when they're not my own," I say sadly.

"Even then," Katniss says. "Even if you don't mean it." She looks at me and smiles, and I smile back. I take her hand in mine and wrap my other arm around her shoulder. She leans her head over on my shoulder and within seconds, her eyes start to flutter.

I carefully scoot to the end of the couch and lay Katniss's head in my lap. It doesn't take me long to doze off myself. I don't know how long I've been asleep until I'm being awaken by screams.

"Please, no! Leave him alone! Leave him alone!" I jolt awake when I realize it's Katniss screaming. "Peeta, come back! Please don't leave," she screams.

I immediately pull her up onto my lap. She slowly wakes up and I can see true terror in her eyes. She quickly wraps her arms around my neck, buries her face in the crook of my neck, and sobs.

"It's okay. I'm right here. I'm okay," I whisper in her ear. Katniss finally calms down enough that she stops crying and her breathing goes back to normal. "You okay?" I ask her as I pull her back enough where I can see her face.

"Yeah," she replies as she nods her head yes.

"You want to talk about it?" I ask her as I pull her in closer. She thinks about this for a minute and then slowly shakes her head no.

"It's not anything new," she whispers. "I feel like I'm repeating myself anymore."

"I know what you mean," I whisper to her as she moves around on my lap to get comfortable. When she finally gets still, she sighs.

"It's like every night a different nightmare with the same scenario has to pop up in my head," Katniss says as the tears start running down her face.

"Just remember that it's not real and when you wake up, I'll be right there protecting you," I tell her as I wipe her tears away with my thumb. "Are you okay now?"

"Yeah," she replies as she stands up. "I think I'm ready to go back to the room now."

"You sure?" I ask as I stand up next to her.

"Yeah, I'm sure," Katniss says as she takes my hand and leads me back to the bedroom. When we get there, I lay down on the bed, and Katniss sits at the edge of it with her head in her hands. I know immediately that she's not going back to sleep.

I get up and sit down next to her. I wrap my arm around her shoulder as she rests her head on mine. No matter how tired we are, we both know that we won't be able to sleep on the train, so we sit there in the same position until we reach the Capitol.

When the train finally stops, me and Katniss stand up simultaneously. I grab our stuff and we get to the doors just as they open. We step off the train and are almost immediately greeted by a guard.

"Peeta and Katniss Mellark?" The guard asks.

"Yes sir," I reply.

"Paylor told us she wanted to talk to you and to immediately escort you to the mansion. Follow me," the guard says as we take off walking. When we finally reach the mansion, we are taken to a room and asked to wait.

"This is where you'll be staying. I'll come get you in ten minutes," the guard says as he leaves. Me and Katniss get ready and then wait for the guard to come back.

"Are you still nervous?" I ask Katniss as we sit down on a couch.

"We'll, the guard seemed nice," Katniss replies. I chuckle a little.

"That's not what I asked you," I whisper as she smiles at me.

"I know," she says as she laughs. "I'm still a little nervous but not as much as I was," Katniss says finally answering my question. I lean in and kiss her.

"We'll be okay," I say. About that time, someone knocks on the door. I get up and open it to find the guard beckoning us to out meeting with Paylor.

Katniss stands up and walks over to me and we take off following the guard. We go down multiple hallways and around several corners until we're finally standing outside Paylor's office door.

The guard opens the door and gestures for us to go on in, so we do.