Baby, Baby, Baby

Eight

Amanda Pov

It was late, like 3 O'clock in the morning late, both Sammy and Danny were asleep, and I was just laying there awake like a bloody plonker, knowing that I was not sleeping at all that night, and then I heard Sammy scream, so I ran out of bed and into Sammy's room, (you would do too in my shoes here Babes).

"It's ok Baby, I got you"

No matter how many times I said that mantra to her, I could not convince myself that it worked for Sammy, even though she always calmed down when I say the mantra to her, like it cannot actually be the mantra that works here, it has to be the fact that I hold her like I held her as a baby, (like it has to be).

"Hey Sweetheart, do you want to talk about it?"
"But it's silly as it's not real Momma"
"Just because it's not real, that doesn't make how it made you feel any less real Darling"
"I drowned"
"That would be scary Sweetheart, let's try and get back to sleep"
"What if I have that again?"
"Then I'll be right here if you need me, ok Baby?"
"Ok Momma"

While I would rather Sammy didn't have nightmares, (because nightmares are not fun to deal with even as an adult here), I was glad that she wasn't having the same one over and over and over again, so going to my aunt Dotty wasn't all in vain, (at least that was what I told myself so that I didn't have another bloody panic attack here, ya know).

"Momma"
"Yeah Baby"
"Can you stay please?"
"Sure Baby, scoot over"

So I manoeuvred us around so that nobody would fall off the bed, (it wasn't a very big bed, as it was a whole arse toddler bed), and sure, my back definitely didn't thank me after I laid down in said small bed, but I totally think that it was worth it for Sammy to feel safe enough to go back to sleep.

"Momma"
"Yeah Baby"
"What if the I another bad dream?"
"Well I'll be right here, ok"
"Ok Momma"

Sammy then went to sleep and it seemed like her nightmares didn't come back that night, (though I'm not entirely sure because I am on the outside looking in), I definitely didn't sleep, (though I don't even sleep when I'm in my own bed, so take that as you will), but I honestly wasn't all that bothered by not sleeping as I had Sammy in my arms and that actually felt right at the time, (though I could've been trying to make up for when I'm not alive anymore).

I must've actually fallen asleep because the next thing that I remember was hearing Danny come into Sammy's room, actually he was probably looking for me, which I kinda got as he found me in the aftermath of a panic attack, (not that he knew that, but he knew something was up about that night).

"Nightmare?"
"Yeah"
"Same one?"
"No actually"
"Wow, it-"
"If you jinx it, I will kill you"
"Good to know"

What I said could've sounded mean if you were in the outside looking in here, (but I promise you that it's just bluntness on my end rather than me having a mean streak in me), but the last thing that I needed was that peculiar nightmare coming back for Sammy, (as that could open up a whole lot of questions that I don't want to be asking anymore about), so I didn't really want a jinx, especially considering that there was already a bloody curse, (though poor Danny didn't know that).

Danny then went to make me a cuppa, (he is the best husband and you can't tell me otherwise), I managed to untangle myself from Sammy and went downstairs, as I wanted to get some bits done before Sammy actually got up, now wether or not I succeeded in doing as such was a different story, as I was pretty exhausted from not sleeping.

"Hey"
"Hey, (kiss), I was going to bring your tea up to you in bed"
"I know you were, but I have some things that I have to do while Sammy's still in bed-"
"If it's to do with the washer, I fixed it"
"How the fuck did you fix the washing machine?"
"It's not dissimilar to an engine-"
"You could've told me that before I attempted to fix the bloody thing myself"
"I didn't know that you tried to fix it"
"Danny if I waited until you had time to spare, I would be waiting fucking weeks and we can't be without a washing machine for that fucking long"
"Yeah I suppose you're right Babe"
"I know I'm right"