as oncie stood in front of his walk in closet, he was debating on which of his green suits to wear. you see, today was a very special day. kaeya promised oncie that they would go to the mall today (kaeya was paying, of course)
as oncie picked out his favorite, neon green suit, he heard kaeyas high pitched screams coming from downstairs. johnny must be trying to stab him again oncie thought, sighing. being a parent was so difficult. as he descended down the stairs, looking like an absolute girlboss, he grabbed johnny by the leg as he was chasing poor kaeya around the kitchen. kaeya is such a good father oncie thought. it must not be easy, entertaining an annoying little brat like johnny. nonetheless, oncie waited for kaeya to stop sobbing and made his way to the car. what could possibly go wrong? as they were driving down the road, a news report interrupted oncie singing along to california girls. kaeya let out a sigh of relief. something about a jailbreak. before the news reporter could finish, oncie destroyed the radio in a fit of rage. the song was reaching its best part oncie sobbed aggressively, swerving off the road on three separate occasions as johnny tried pushing kaeya out of the window. oncie could have swore he saw a very familiar pig walking down the street. he simply assumed it was her little brother, george. after all, oncie was driving way too fast to tell. he began to wonder how george was doing, seeing as how oncie killed his older sister, peppa. oncie had gone to thneedville highschool with him, and he heard that he now had a wife and kids. good for him. although he wondered how, seeing as how george only said a total of five words during his highschool years. nonetheless, as oncie pulled into the parking lot, he stopped crying almost instantly. today was the day he got to spend all of kaeyas money. as kaeya went to close the car door, johnny slammed it on his hand. it felt like that one spongebob scene.
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^this but its kaeya oncie ignored kaeyas cries for help, and instead grabbed his wallet from his non broken hand and began to skip happily towards the first shop, leaving kaeya alone with johnny. im sure they will be fine. oncie hummed, excited to spend all of kaeyas money. ever since oncie had to go to court, his parents disowned him and cut off his allowance. since then he had to survive with only a three story house, and only one pony. oncie almost shed a singular tear while thinking about it. meanwhile, unknown to oncie, they had been followed. a tall, pink figure stood in the distance. today, she would have her revenge.
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