Blackout ✓

27 | want it all

THE BURST OF JOY WRACKING me was so visceral that my body couldn't hold it—I was laughing and wrapping my arms around his neck and, yes, hormone crying.

Jamie's pillowy lips were endlessly familiar, probably because I hadn't replaced them with any other in all the months since promising to be friends again. We kissed and kissed as the rain poured down mere feet away from the overhang sheltering us.

I pulled away to gauge Jamie's reaction, our mouths parting with an audible smooch. His giddy smile matched my own.

A surprised giggle burst out of my lungs. "Hi."

"Hello," he said, his thumbs gently wiping away the moisture on my face.

Then Jamie's powerful arms encircled my waist and lifted me to his chest, spinning me around and around in the air. I felt lighter than hydrogen, and just as excitable—I felt like I'd found home. My jubilant laughter didn't stop until he set me down.

We stayed intertwined, gazing at each other. My fingers coiled lazily through his hair.

"You know, it was good until you said my full name," Jamie whispered. "For future reference."

I murmured back, "I like your full name."

"No-one likes my full name—" I do. I love everything about you. "—but thanks for saying that."

An argument bristled at the tip of my tongue, but Jamie swooped down for another kiss before I could push the matter. His mouth swept firmly across mine before I felt his teeth tugging my lower lip. A trickle of pure lightning slid down my spine and settled in my core.

Then Jamie slid his tongue in and my train of thought combusted. The way he explored the contours of my mouth, tasting, testing, teasing, and matched my movements, was more addictive than alcohol.

We parted, but not by much. Jamie rested his lips against my forehead, his chest rising and falling in front of my eyes. I was so ecstatic I'd stopped feeling my extremities.

"By the way," he said, the rumble of his voice reverberating through me, "I love you, too."

I bit my lip, ridiculously unfairly happy. "I— Wait." I glanced up at Jamie and stepped backward, out of his embrace. "Did you just cheat on Farrah? Am I the other woman now?"

Jamie shook his head. "Farrah's just a study buddy."

I cocked my brows. "Who you were 'getting to know' the whole semester. Who comes to visit you at the dorm and who studies with you. Who brings you free food all the time. Who supports you at all your events." Sounded like a doting girlfriend to me.

"Farrah and I have a Computer Science class together, which she couldn't grasp. I offered to help because I don't struggle with coding, but she wouldn't take any free tutoring, and I wouldn't give her my Venmo. So she paid me in UberEats whenever I wanted, with, I admit, startling frequency. I think I gained weight just from the last month alone."

I frowned. Tutoring someone precluded nothing. I was helping Jamie with Innovating Philanthropy the entire semester, but that didn't mean I hadn't wanted to jump his bones the whole time.

"Did you ever..." I touched my forefingers together.

"No!" Jamie laughed.

"But Farrah's into you! I know she is."

"She's definitely not."

"She is," I insisted. "Remember the night you two met? She'd been giving you bedroom eyes in the bar. You can't deny that."

"I won't deny it," Jamie agreed. "But she wasn't giving me bedroom eyes. If Farrah wanted to hook up with me, why wouldn't we have gone to 'study' in my bedroom instead of the first floor, where you and the girls were? Plus, the whole reason she wanted to come to the IP study sessions was because of you."