Into the Light

Hello Mom

12th June 2000 / New York

Robin's POV

I've been blankly staring out the window for a while now, looking up at the blue sky and the white clouds floating past. A bird or two might pass now and then, coming to say hello. The nurses do their best to talk to me, they'll say hello or just chat away to me, even though I don't speak. The only person I talk to is my friend Andy, he's kind and patient with me and I feel as though I can trust him, after all, he is a detective, if I can't trust him, who can I trust.

I've been in the hospital for nearly 2 weeks now and I can slowly feel myself opening up. I've been drawing a lot, reading the dictionary over and over, trying my best to remember the words inside. Andy also brought me a little radio for me to listen to music which has been like another little friend to me. He brought a few books in for me to read and so naturally I've read them twice already. I have nothing else to do but sit and stare out the window when my mind drifts off so if I keep myself distracted, I don't drift off as much.

My attention is drawn to the door when it creaks open "Hello Robin". A wide smile stretches across my lips when I see Andy walking in "Hello..... Andy". He sits down in his usual place, on the uncomfortable-looking chair next to my bed. "How are you today?" I sigh sweetly at his question, taking a moment to think of how I'm feeling "I'm..... okay". "That's great.... Now... I have something for you" My eyes light up with excitement, wondering what on earth he could have gotten me this time. I shuffle closer a few inches, scanning his hands as they slip inside his bag. He pulls out a book, but this one looks different, it doesn't look like the reading books that he brought me, nor the dictionary "What.... is...it". "It's a journal.... totally empty... you could write in it daily.... just write whatever is on your mind.... keep it secret though... I have one at home... write in it every night... it can help" Placing it on my lap. I hook my fingers around the book, slowly opening the pages to see the empty lines ready to be filled "Thank you".

"Listen.... your parents are in the waiting room... but I won't let them in... until you say you're ready.... this is entirely up to you Robin" I breathe in a few deep breaths, hoping it will help calm my nerves. I know this moment has been coming because he told me very early on, so I've had plenty of time to come to terms with it. I want to see my parents again, especially my mom, but It's been so long that I'm nervous "Okay.... I'm ready".

'Just stay calm... It's going to be okay' Is what I'm telling myself on repeat while Andy is bringing my parents in to meet me. The door slowly creaks open and first into the room is Andy, giving me a slight nod as he makes way for my parents. My eyes go wide when I set my eyes on my mom who looks beautiful with her blonde hair, just like mine. She elicits a sobbed gasp, clamping her hand round her mouth in shock. They both go running at me prompting me to shuffle back nervously. Andy places his hand out "Take it slow... remember what I told you" He whispers to them with a serious expression. They both give him a nod and slowly make their way over to me, my heart thumping out my chest. My hands instinctively pull the blankets right up to my chin as a way of protecting myself.

"Hello, Robin" My mom is the first to pipe up with a teary smile, her hands itching to reach out and touch me but I know I'm not ready for that yet "Hello mom". Another sob elicits from her mouth upon hearing my nervous voice "I can't believe how beautiful you are.... we've missed you so much". I offer no words in response as I'm not exactly sure how to respond to that. I've spent 10 years on my own, being abused every day. Andy shuffles to the left side of my bed, right by my side so I don't freak out.

"We brought you some things.... that belongs to you... they're yours" She places a bag onto the bed, gesturing to it with her eyes. Immediately I glance at Andy for guidance, he gives me a reassuring nod and smiles warmly. I bite my lip as my hands slowly move towards it, my fingers slowly opening it up. I peer inside to see a large book, a doll, and a few other things. I hesitantly grab onto the heavy book, pulling it out of the bag.