Introspection

Simply Unknowing Convolution

I have told you.

You know.

I said I'm not feeling gloom.

But I never confessed about the pain that followed, did I now?

It is not like grieving over a loss.

Trying to reminiscence what can never be.

No, instead it's like a physical wound.

Cut deep into my heart.

The pain is what unleashes the tears.

I'm trying so hard to keep standing.

To keep myself from craving you.

Because I'm simply afraid I'll ruin what we have now.

I'm afraid of my very own love.

I'm willing to close myself off from anyone.

Rebuilding the walls around my heart seems to tempting.

But you still have access, no matter what.

No matter how strong I make my walls, you always just walk right in.

I know I cannot look you into the eyes the same as before.

That saddens me.

But it's a challenge I'm willing to partake.

I've gone through so much pain already, this wouldn't hurt more, would it?