A Dove's Innocence

of all things, her tears were gourmet

The week after Crow came to Milani's room and her little fight with Olivia went by as a blur more than anything. Milani had forgotten, or perhaps she just didn't care enough to remember, her birthday was coming up in now just six days. She was only reminded when Miss Rae mentioned it and her mother reminded her of the preparations that needed to be made. Today was a particularly bad day for Milani, though she seemed to be having more of those than good ones lately. She attended one of the dress-fittings for her birthday gala, the dressmaker chastising her for gaining weight so quickly. Olivia made a conscious effort to insert her own opinions when talking about the decor and flower arrangements. Milani's mother's incessant yapping echoed in her ears even now when she was a good distance away from the woman and settled in the comfort of her own room. The sound of scratches at the window brought Milani out of her bad day haze, her hand reaching for the knob and a smile appearing on her face as Crow entered her room. He perched himself on her hand,

"I didn't think I'd see you again," she admitted out loud. She knew that Crow couldn't speak and that this was their second time meeting, but she was glad that he had come back.

"Wait here, I've got some seeds to snack on!" As she looked around for the stash of seeds she had hidden in her room, she talked about her day to Crow because even if he couldn't speak, he'd at least listen to her. Right now, that was the thing she needed, someone who'd listen. Eventually, Milani settled into bed while Crow had curled up next to her like he did the first night they met,

"If only the war was over," Milani found herself saying. But after realizing who it was being said to, "I shouldn't be talking, every day's like a war to you, right? After all, wild animals like you have to do whatever it takes to survive. But I'd really love to have you with me and I'd keep you safe here, even if you are a raven in the White Dove Kingdom." Despite knowing that Crow probably didn't understand her, she could swear on her life that he moved closer to her as if he did.

The second she opened her eyes the next morning Milani felt an emptiness at the spot Crow had slept on just last night and seeing him gone only confirmed it. As the week went on and preparations for Milani's birthday gala were finalized, all she really had to do was sit still, look pretty.

Say yes to the dressmaker even if the dress was too tight.

Agree with her mother about the cake even if she hated the flavor.

Smile at Olivia even if she was annoying.

All the things Milani had to go through and the feelings she had to suppress ended up becoming more bearable than it had been all the other years. Because every night of the week, Crow had visited and she was able to talk, well— vent to him which was something she was previously unable to do with anyone, even Miss Rae.

But when Milani's birthday finally came, the guests arrived, ballroom and hall set up, the feelings she suppressed threatened to surface. The guests didn't seem as if they wanted to be here and only attended out of courtesy. She couldn't blame them, how could she when she didn't want to be there either? Birthdays were supposed to be a time of celebration and happiness but when it came to being a part of the royal family, birthdays and holidays were mere business deals. It came as no surprise to her when her leaving went unnoticed by everyone as she made her way to her room. Even though she didn't like the flavor, she brought a slice of cake with her.

She told herself it didn't matter that the only one to actually greet her a happy birthday was Miss Rae. She reminded herself that it was like this every year and she shouldn't have expected this one to be any different. Upon entering her room, Milani sat at her vanity, looking at herself in the mirror. The sad and hollow chuckle that filled its silence seconds after was almost unstoppable. The plate thrown onto the vanity, without a care for the mess it resulted in.

The cake tasted artificial despite having been made by one of the best patisseries in the kingdom.

Her dress that was "custom made" felt more suffocating than ashes in your face while you sat by a campfire.

The compliments that met her ears were backhanded, the jewels gifted were blinding rather than sparkling.

She knew one thing about tonight.

Of all things, her tears were gourmet. And now they were falling life leaves on a windy autumn day. The familiar scratch on the window causes Milani to clear her throat and wipe her tears, opening the window she was met with Crow's presence. Crow looked up at her, noticing the change with the princess both in the room's mood and her appearance.

Crow flew up at face level with Milani, a feeling previously unknown now attacking every cell in his body. He didn't like that she was crying and he didn't know why. He couldn't name the feeling, not yet at least. With the wing Milani had help heal, Crow wiped away the tears that fell. He didn't realize how much he had allowed her to enter his heart until now.

[ author's note ]

— i made this a bday chapter for Milani since it's almost my bday lol also, the next chapter will still be written in third person but it's Crow's pov (if you read the story under the youtube comment you probably know who Crow is ;))