a Little Blurry | Billie Eilish

² wastın' my breath

billie pov

i am more in love with jordan than i ever thought was possible. she is far too good for choosing to live in my presence... simple as that.
her aura is enough to make my insides tickle sweetly and the more days pass, the stronger my adoration gets.

her. she. there's nothing i wouldn't risk to have her in my arms.

"billie!" her soft voice calls for the third time.

i was too deep in thought to answer her before, daydreaming of how perfect my girlfriend is... no, perfect is not the right word. unsurpassable.

for me, at least.

"baby?" jordan's voice errupts again, this time from right next to me and not in her usual tone. she sounds sad.
"why are you not coming when i call for you?"

"excuse me, jordan. i was thinking." i say, lifting myself off of our bed and joining her, grabbing her soft hand.
"what do you need?"

"i was wondering if you wanted to eat something. you have been writing all morning." she frowns.

a smile creeps onto my face, showing my affection once again.

"i know, and i'm sorry. what you got in mind?" i say.

"i was thinking maybe i cook you something. anything specific you're craving?" my girlfriend asks, tightening her grip on my hand and pulling me downstairs with her, leading me into the kitchen.

i sit down on the counter stool and simply look at her getting some pans and utensils out, placing them down carefully.

"hmm..." i think out loud.
"yeah i think i know something." i say, smirking as she turns to look at me again.

"okay, tell me."

"it's right there." i say as i point right at her, causing her cute ass self to turn around confusedly.

"am i blind?" jordan asks, trying to find what i was pointing at.

"no, it's like right in front of me." i joke, remaining with the same dumb smile on my face.

"where?!"

"you. crackhead. i'm craving you."

"oh-" jordan laughs, gripping the edge of the counter as she shakes her head.
"no, billie. tell me what you wanna eat."

"i just did!" i yell.

"fool, you already had enough last night!" she laughs, my face turning bright red.

"true but you didn't let me do you..." i say, my mind trailing off to a few hours ago.

「 flashback 」

"fuck, you're crazy." i breathe, trying my best to get my normal breathing back while jordan climbs up from under the covers.

"and the only one who does it how you like, baby." she smirks, laying down again.

"that's for sure." i chuckle, lacing my fingers with hers and pulling her back over to me.
"come on-"

"no, billie. i'm tired, you should sleep too." jordan says, disappointing me a little bit.

the last time she let me eat her out was before we even moved into our own place. too damn long ago.

"but mamas, it's your turn now." i whine, grabbing her by the waist as the moonlight shines through the panorama windows of our master bedroom, giving her face extra shine.

"hm, not tonight."

i decide to stop pressuring her and pull the covers over our bodies, letting the warmth slowly take over again.

"goodnight then. thank you." i speak, kissing her cheek without any bad intentions.

"night, i love you." jordan says, smiling against my slightly sweaty chest.

"i love you too, baby."

「 flashback end 」

"here you go, my dear pillow queen." i hear her say, the sound of a plate being placed in front of me on the black marble surface.

"but-" i start.

"no but's, you get what i give you. now eat." jordan says as she sits down next to me, nodding towards the food waiting before me.

a grilled cheese sandwich.

"you're only getting away this time." i grin, starting to eat with her eyes staying on me as i savor the taste of an amazing dish.

ℵ

"jordan! come here right now!"

"what? you okay, bil?" my girlfriend yells, running into the livingroom to where i am currently sitting.

"sit down, quick!" i speak, not taking my eyes off of the mac book on my lap.

since we wanted to go bigger, i thought maybe i start looking for some new places and i think i just found the perfect one. i only need jordan for a quick confirmation.

"what got you all hyped up, baby?" she laughs, finally placing her ass down beside me.

"look, look!" i say, pointing at the screen.

the house is mostly modern, although it looks like it's been around for a little. nice big windows offer a carefree view into the huge garden. plants everywhere... palm trees, bushes, blossoms and even cactuses fill the area.

"what is this?" jordan asks, a little confused.

"what do you mean 'what is this?'" i laugh, smiling at how cute she just is.
"a house... well, more than that." i explain, joy filling my heart at the thought of us running around in that exact garden.

"for us?"

"of course for us, you bozo."

no words are needed from her to give me a reaction. her smile is reflecting in the screen. how cute...

"but billie, look at the price-" jordan starts, her tone changing to a worried one.

"since when do you give a fuck about the price?" i express, widening my eyes at her.

"since you decided to spend almost nine million dollars on a house!"

"our house!" i correct, getting this sudden wave of electricity.