When Taehyung suggests you all go on a one-week road-trip to Busan to enjoy Jimin's "last days of freedom" before his marriage, you aren't very much surprised -after all, your best friend is a master at coming up with stupid plans.
But feigning that...
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You thought things would look better in the morning after a good night's rest.
Obviously, they don't.
Yesterday sadness still weighs upon you, despite the river of tears you shed as soon as you set foot in your house; it swells up into your liquid, puffy eyes, branching under your skin to your brain like poison that pollutes your mind -impeding you to see the issues from a brighter perspective or, as usual, to feign they didn't exist in the first place.
In a more careful analysis, it's not the first time you find yourself in a similar situation -you, dealing with an ex who bumps into you all of a sudden, over the moon, slamming in your face the grandiosity of their lives after your rupture.
However, this time, it's harder to handle the idea-well, the absolute certainty that you weren't special enough for Kim Seokjin.
And it's not even necessary to take a trip in places of yourself that you usually avoid visiting to understand which is the root of your affliction -why Seokjin has always been a step ahead of everyone when it came to your heart: he's been your very first, serious boyfriend (after a multitude of crushes withered within months, or random hook-ups that left you with a void that couldn't be filled); the first guy you introduced to your parents with a lump in your stomach -the first who introduced you to his parents labeling you as 'my girlfriend' (after years of 'my best friend' ) while the nausea brewed in your stomach, afraid at the prospect of making a bad impression; the first whom you shared your wardrobe with; the first who told you that he loved you (abruptly, with a pair of glowing eyes that made you lose gravity); the first man that made you think about a future crafted for two -where 'us' sounded so much better than 'me' .
The first man who made your whole world and all your plans crumble for a barely whispered: "no".
Considering the abovementioned list and the seed that notched your love story, it's not stretch to believe that your brain had a devastating breakdown at the realization that Seokjin is doing great even without you—!
You give a flinch when your phone vibrates for the fifth time incessantly, distracting you from your whirling thoughts. It takes you a couple of seconds to realise that your lunch break started a few minutes ago, while you're still hunched over the workbench situated in the laboratory to fix some flower sculptures you've to consign within this weekend. Slowly, as if your brain was still basking in a sort of haze, you register the cheerful and muffled voice of Euhna behind the closed door, busy serving a customer in the shop.
Pressing your palms on the rim of the table, you pull the stool back, stretching your back to provide some relief to your tensed muscles. Scrunch in your nose, your hand runs to massage the back of your left shoulder, stiff for the hours spent in this position.
Shit, you feel like a wretch...
Your eyelids are heavy and itch as if you weren't sleeping in weeks. You can still feel the ghost of tears flowing down your cheeks, finding yourself to chew on your bottom lip to keep them at bay as if you had to burst out crying anytime soon. Muscles in your head tighten, obliging you to squeeze your eyes shut to interrupt that pounding sensation pulsing in your temples.
