My bandmate

Prologue

Music has always been a big part of my life. Ever since I was a young pup I loved the way the heavy vibration sends shivers down my spine, and the way the almost poetic words filled my mind with ease.  There are times it feels as if the music is teaching my brain how to flow, how to be so peaceful. It's as if the slowly changing tone touches different parts, a sort of auditory massage for my mind. It is an invitation for slowness and to feel the presence of myself, the ever-patient version of me who waits to be spoken to and is content to do so. 

Even though it started as not more than a hobby, it managed to lead me down the path to where I am now. In arguably one of the most famous bands of all time "cherry". and yes, I am well aware that it is in fact named after a fruit, you don't have to remind me. The back story of the name is actually quite funny. 

so it all starts in high school. I was new to the school and cute frankly petrified. when I was on my way into the school for the first time Mason came running towards me with what looked to be a terrifyingly angry alpha after him. He decided upon using my body as his own personalized shield from the alpha, who turned out to be Zion. 

I later discovered the reasoning as to how the beta had managed to piss off the alpha when a cherry came flying full force right in my face.  Mason had a weird fascination with throwing cherries at people, he defended himself with the reasoning that it made the unbearably boring school day more entertaining. when I learned that we had a lot of untouched cherry trees on school ground, I obviously took it to my advantage and got back at the beta. later on, we going forces and made it our mission to annoy the living shit out of everyone in our school. That is also how we meet Damion and Caleb. We hit the wrong people and were chased all throughout our lunch break. 

We all discovered our interest in music later on and decided on starting a band. we played at small events, and slowly worked our self up with the help of social media, and eventually got a record deal. since then we have made two albums, with one in the making, and have toured through the whole world twice. we are so fortunate to have this astounding life.

but even with the glory of it all, doesn't always cover up the suffering one has to go through to get there. we were all stript from our private life, there is no such thing as privacy in a life of fame. our every move has consequences. It's hard to live a life that is no longer controlled by en self. but luckily we have each other to lean on when things get bad. I wouldn't have lasted a  week without these boys' support.  it's in their nature to care for the weeker. That is why Damion, Caleb, and Zion as alphas tend to take more responsibility and care for me and Mason. More me than Mason, since I am on the weeker side of beta while mason is almost as strong and level-headed as the alphas. but the thing is, I'm not a beta. I so deeply wish I was, but I'm not. unfortunately, I'm an omega in hiding. 

Omegas are rare. There are far less than a thousand of us in the modern-day world. why that is, is because the reproductive systems of omegas don't take on the omega gene properly, seeing that the alpha gene is far more superior. It is rare for an omega to reproduce its gene. And therfore lack of omegas is inevedeble.  

If I were to expose my rightful secondary gender, I would be treated as if I was a glass about to break. I would be classified as vulnerable and fragile. our management would go into chaos figuring out how to shield me from all forms of danger. My bandmates would be in content worry. But I don't want to be treated like I'm unable to depend on myself, I want to be equal to others. At a young age, I decided on taking suppressants to use. I understudy the consequences of what the omega status would do to my life. I would not be here, in this band, living the life I so dearly wished to have if I was never put on the illegal drug. 

even though the drugs may have its side effects, it is the only thing that I have control over. it's freeing to be able to make a decision for myself, even if it isn't as good as one could have hoped.