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| Drugs | chapter nine

| Had to give in, couldn't give up

I just want you, but I don't do drugs |

nessa's pov

jaden left, it was sort of expected. i knew he wouldn't be so upfront with the idea of us since it also involves josh and mads. but i took that slim chance hoping he'd be open to it.

clearly he wasn't.

it was the next day in the after noon, jaden and i still haven't spoken and it gets me worried, thinking i ruined the friendship between us.

my thoughts got interrupted by a knock on my door. "mads..?" i question after opening the door. she didn't say anything but pushed me.
"what the fuck?"

"are you serious? jaden told me you tried kissing me yesterday. what the actual fuck nessa. you were my BEST friend. best friends don't have feelings for their boyfriends." mads ranted, my breath hitched.

jaden told mads, he kind of have every right to but it still hurt. i thought we were closer than that. "he isn't your boyfriend." is all i can say.
she rolled her eyes while she let a breath out.

"nessa are you serious? he's my ex. whatever he was once my boyfriend—either way you don't DO that." she shouted in my face, "i won't hold this against you though, i'm going to continue to be your friend. but nessa...please don't. i'm still very much in love with him." mads sighs, her eyes get watery.

i nod not knowing if i can keep this promise.
"thank you." she smiled at me, mads fixed her hair and wiped her tears before leaving. i let out a breath and immediately picked up my phone to text jaden.

jaden <33

jaden wtf ?
why did you tell
mads?

why shouldn't i?
you tried kissing
your best friend's
ex boyfriend

jaden i thought
we were closer than
that, & you like
me to. you aren't
a saint

never said i was
that's why i also
told josh i liked you

you what?

mhm & i also told
him he doesn't have to
worry bc ima stay away
from you

j. why would you
do that? we're FRIENDS
you don't have to stay
away from me

i want to
though. bc
...nvm

whtevr ur a dick
read 1:47 pm

i let out a heavy breath as my heart drop straight down to my stomach. knowing jaden would avoid me at all cost makes my world want to crash into pieces. i wouldn't call him my everything, but he's definitely a big part of my life and he leaving so fast and easily hurts.

jaden told me so effortlessly, like he knew it would break me but he still did it anyways to avoid his feelings for me. deeply sighing i tried brushing it off, too not think to deeply into it.

but i already started to miss him and it's only been half a day. is this what being addicted feels like?

too be longing for someone or something, too be enthusiastically devoted to a particular person or thing.

because it's not a good feeling to always want that person near you.

jaden's pov

the thing is, i didn't tell josh about my feelings for nessa. it would absolutely break him. i just needed a real excuse to keep away from nessa.

it's like when you have an addiction to a veritable something but you don't find a cure for it, you find a way to work around your addiction.

the cure for my addiction to nessa would be dating her, but instead i'm working a way around it. avoiding her at all cost.

but i know this would only end up in chaos for the both of us.

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