The Bottom Club

interlude: two

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THE BOTTOM CLUB

ep. 02 • ivy league thot

RATING: 16+ | CREATOR: Wyatt. RM. Carter | RUN TIME: 7.32 | DOWNLOADS: 1.2M
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[You can only hear the crackling sound of static at first]

Hey, hi, what's good, what's popping―because I know I might be...? I think.

[Speaker chuckles nervously]

Okay this is ridiculous, but whatever. It's not like any sane person is listening to this. My English teacher says I have a soothing voice and that maybe I should consider a career in entertainment: but you know, I can't sing, act, or paint.

So basically: I'm talentless with no future prospects.

Which is why I'm on Podster spilling the tea like an anonymous Twitter user on parts of my life that nobody wants to hear about, and today I'll be talking about that one time my nudes leaked and I got approached by this adult entertainment agency with an offer for one thousand dollars if I shot a solo scene.

I wish. That was a bad joke, I know.

I'm actually here to turn up the heat on every single boy I have ever had been with. Yes I am petty. Also, I function on just two brain cells and vibes.

Side note: I've been playing this love song nonstop and I swear you guys, they wrote that song with me in mind, periodt. I know it's really old, but the streaming and download links will be in the show notes so when you're done listening to this piece of garbage rant about stuff GO AND LISTEN TO THAT SONG!

[A brief pause]

Now, I know your cups are always set, but art thou ready? For tea will be spilled, and shade thrown everywhere.

If you've watched Rich Kids of Beverly Hills, or Netflix's Elite then you may not need a preface, but for those of you who still live under rocks, I'll have to set a background. Ivy League in this sense are usually from money―quick disclaimer: I go to a prep school but I'm not loaded so, yeah―and even then, there are different levels to having money: Above Average Rich, Crazy Rich, and then Richer than God Rich. Sometimes they're members of top notch sororities and fraternities, but I digress. Guess the category your least favorite thot has dated into: AA, RTG? No bitch, all, because I'm expensive and was born for a life of luxury and glory.

(Because as you know, I'm a walking Lana Del Rey music video.)

To be honest it kind of went from the bottom up, and I didn't exactly date this particular guy, but we hooked up. And I oop―

[He clears his throat; the sound of music playing in the background is all you can hear for a few seconds]

I met him at a party―we'll call him Dylan, which is actually really close to his real name but whatever―that was being hosted by the friend of a friend and I happened to receive an exclusive invite because, excuse me, I bring the party. Purr.

[Tongue pop]

Dylan was a college boy and frankly my dear, I don't care, because I like them a little bit older. Actually, I like them anyway, but whatever. Moving on, at the time I was really into the guy who invited me to that party, and so there really was no hope that it would be more than a onetime fling but you know, whatever.

So let's backtrack for a bit and let me confess that I have literally had the biggest crush on Dylan since I was fifteen, because he's high-key a celebrity or whatever. Yes, this dummy slept with a famous person, get over it.

[Clears his throat]

Basically, I was kind of peer pressured into doing drugs by his other crazy rich friends and the guy I went with, and you know I agreed.

And then we danced for a bit, and I played a game―which resulted in a disastrous episode of spin the bottle that I am still too scared to relive.

Spoiler: never again

[Finger snap]

And I went out for air and kind of just... bumped into him on my way back. And he offered to give me a tour of his houses (in case I didn't mention this: his house was where the party was being held) and I agreed, because I was drunk as fuck and still reeling from... moving on.

So Dylan and I are talking when out of nowhere he calls me beautiful and what do I do? LAP IT UP BINCHES. I ate those compliments up, and then out of nowhere we started kissing. Next thing I knew, belts were coming off and whambamthankyouma'am we were at it. Things kind of escalated after that, [He chuckles] flew everywhere, if you know what I mean.

[Coughs deviously]

My therapist says I need to work on my self-esteem and that this may have had a reason to do with why I kind of let things go south so fast. And while on one hand this is possible―on the other, girl, it's okay to admit I was horny.

But let me get real with you guys for a second: A lot of times in the past I've led myself to believe that intimacy like that equals love. I've been in situations where I'd send nudes to guys if I felt like they were growing distant. I've let things happen to me because I felt like, like everyone shows love differently. You know?

But I want to heal, so yes; I'm spilling the tea on my life as it is. But at the same time I'm hoping that by sending these words into the great big world, laying all my cards out, things somehow begin to make sense.

[He laughs awkwardly]

Enough with me being so sappy: please share this to your friends, tell them about this podcast if you can, and if you have any questions, feel free to reach me at bywyattcarter on Instagram and Twitter. Thank you so much for listening, I love you. Bye.

[The crackling sound from earlier starts up again, a brief pause; the next episode begins]