Begin Again

4

I pull into the small deserted parking lot in front of Coolio's. I guess we forgot to take into consideration that it's a holiday.
Leo pulls in next to me and shrugs before getting out of his car. I follow him to the door as he pulls the handle to no avail.
"Damn, I guess Stan closed up for winter break," Leo says, pushing his hair back.
It's weird to be standing next to him even outside this place. On the inside it feels like no time has passed but looking at Leo's matured face reminds me of just how long it's been.
Leo turns away from the door and I'm bracing for the goodbye but then there's a click and the door swings open.
"Holy shit, would you look at this," Stan says from inside, his usual welders hat on his head. I'm not sure if he's ever welded anything in his life. "Leo alone was a treat but now I get both of you?"
Stan steps out and wraps me in a hug. "It's great to see you," I say. "We didn't know you were closed."
He lets go of me and grabs Leo's hand. "For you two? We're never closed. Come, come. See if you can spot all the changes in the last- how long has it been?"
"Five years," Leo and I say in unison.
"Too long," Stan says, waving his hand in the air as we walk in. "You have to visit more."
"Yeah, we do," Leo says behind me.
I can't help but notice the way he says "we" but I'm more distracted by the lights and sounds of the new machines. I spot a few of the old games and the broken sectional is still in the back corner on the old, orange shag rug.
"Damn Stan, Guitar Hero?"
Stan puts his hands up, palms out. "A few upgrades. Wait until you see the new snack menu. The higher ups in the school district footed the bill so I can't complain."
"That's awesome, I'm sure the kids love it," Leo says walking further into the room.
Stan chuckles. "Kids, you are kids. Stay, enjoy."
Before we can protest, Stan disappears into his office leaving us alone in a place we used to call ours.

Before
We sat for a long time in silence which was usually ok with us. Our favorite spot at Coolio's was the old, dirty, broken sectional couch in the back corner. It sat on top of an old, orange shag carpet that's probably been here since the place opened in the 70s.
When we used to come here after school, we'd play games for a while then order snacks and sit here and do our homework. Since we've graduated, we don't come here as often. But I asked Leo to meet me here because I have something to tell him.
"I got a job," I blurt out.
Leo turns to me with a smile but it looks practiced. "Congratulations," he says.
"It's in California," I say before he can say anything else.
His smile wavers just a little bit. "Wow, that's awesome. I'm so happy for you."
In my head, I imagined him telling me not to go. To stay here with him. But of course he wouldn't, we're just friends.
"Thank you," I say, pushing my short red hair behind my ears. "I'm nervous but excited."
I'm just saying words because it would be awkward not to. Leo stays smiling, acting genuinely happy for me.
"It's going to be weird without you here," he finally says.
I can't stop the words from coming out. "Come with me," I say. "There are plenty of schools out there, we could be roommates and save money."
Leo chuckles and runs a hand through his hair. "I'm not really a Cali kind of guy."
I knew that but I was hoping he was a Cassie kind of guy. "It could be fun."
"Nah," he says, standing up. "This is your adventure. I'll be here when you get back."
I don't know what he means by that. Would he be waiting for me? Would we be together if I ever moved back home? Together how?
Instead of asking any of those questions I just say, "You better."
And that was the last time I ever saw him.

Now, it still feels familiar but different. My favorite game, Mrs Pac-Man, is still right where I left it and to my surprise, my name is still on the high score list. It was the top score at one time but it's moved down a bit since then.
Leo hands me a quarter and I can't resist. My hands grab the joy stick and hover over the buttons like it's second nature. Muscle memory is a real thing and as soon as the classic music starts my hands go to work. I do pretty well, not my best but for not playing in years, I'd say it's pretty good.
"She's still got it," Leo says next to me.
I follow him over to his favorite pinball machine and watch him strategically keep the ball in play, sending it through holes and up ramps racking up quite a score. If there was a high score board on this old machine, I think Leo would still have the top spot.
We play a few more games, old ones we used to love and new ones we aren't very good at. I kick his ass in air hockey, like usual but he beats me in Mario Kart Arcade. We laugh and joke just like we used to. Other than the way we look and the way Coolio's looks, everything feels the same.
I smell popcorn and and my eyes follow the scent to the small coffee table in front of the sectional in the back and see Stan placing various food items. Neither one of us has the heart to tell him we just ate, instead we sit down in our normal spots and eat.
There's nachos, popcorn, soft pretzels, even churros. Back in the day it was just popcorn and freezer burnt popsicles. Stan comes back again with two cans of Dr Pepper which he remembers, of course, is our favorite.
"This is weird," Leo says quietly when Stan walks away.
My heart clenches in a bad way. "Yeah," I say, agreeing with him even though I don't feel weird at all.
Leo looks at me with a hint of embarrassment. "No, I mean it's weird that it's not weird. I feel like we were just here yesterday but we weren't."
There's sadness at the end of his sentence and I feel it too. It feels so natural and easy being with Leo so why did we ever stop?
I left, that's why. I chose a new life and in that, I left my old one behind. I don't even remember if he tried reaching out to me after I moved or if it was all just cold turkey.
"I've missed this," I say, looking at Leo and willing him to look at me. "I'm sorry."
His eyes meet mine and he shakes his head. "There's nothing to be sorry for. We were kids, life happens. I've never been mad at you or resented you. I have missed you though."
My breath catches and I smile automatically. "I've missed you too, more than I thought."
Leo smiles at me and I'm trying really hard to ignore the vibration in my pocket. Then I remember I'm flying out later and the vibration is definitely my mother calling to ask me where I am and why I'm not spending time with her.
I pull my phone out and I'm shocked that it's almost 3pm. I have to leave for the airport in two hours.
I sigh. "I have to go."
"Leaving again," Leo says but I look up to see him smirking.
"Not funny," I say, standing up. "Let's not go another five years."
"Actually," Leo says, standing up too, "I was thinking of hopping over to California when I leave Nevada."
I do my best to keep my excitement down but I swear my eyes are spinning. "I know someone who lives there," I joke, my smile splitting my face.
"Think they'll let me crash on their couch?" He asks.
"I think that can be arranged."
Leo Salinger is going to stay with me in my apartment. On a list of things that I thought might happen in the new year, this didn't even come close.
He takes a step toward me and I have a few seconds to register that he's going to hug me. I reach my arms up and wrap them around his neck. He seems taller than I remember and a little more muscular.
Leo wraps his arms around my waist and holds tight, like he's afraid if he lets go I'd float away. "It was great seeing you," he says in my ear.
My whole body shivers and I hope to god he can't feel it. "You too," I whisper back. "I'll see you soon."
Leo let's go and steps back. "You better," he says, just like I did the last time we were here.
I roll my eyes and turn to leave. I shout goodbye to Stan and promise to visit next time I'm in town. When I reach the door I can't help but look back. Leo's in the same place, looking down at his phone.
There's no denying that he's only gotten better looking. If I had to describe my perfect person it would be pretty damn close to Leo. Though you can't learn a person in a few hours so I'm sure there's things about him that I don't know.
If he keeps his word, it looks like I'll have some more time to get to know him again.