So from a distance I will be watching (a.h )

I dont know what you mean

TW: slut-shaming

"I'm just thinking of all the things I want to do to you, Alex"

"Sir I- I don't know what you mean" you say as he gets closer to you. Closing the space between you. You can feel his body heat radiating off him. The smell of wood and books invading your senses.

"Dr. Alexandria Reid You are a smart woman, riddle me this" he says tilting his head "a woman and a man meet in a bar then realise they work in the same profession. She comes into his workplace wearing a gorgeous outfit and smelling like lavender. How is that man supposed to keep his hands off her for an entire day?"

"Well sir you didn't exactly keep your hands off me all day or are we forgetting about that" you say in the most bratty tone you can conjure up as he grabs your waist. You pray Spencer and the rest of the team can't see the two of you. You grab Hotch by the collar taking control and pull him down to your lips. Meeting him for the most passionate kiss you had ever felt. It was magical. It felt like you were floating, it was just you and him.

That was of course until you heard the cheers of the team. You were so embarrassed. Not only was your brother giving you the most judging look, but you kissed his - the team's superior in front of them. You felt awful. Or you would do if Aaron's hand hadn't made his way around his waist pulling you into him again.

"Alexandria. Dana. Reid? That can't be you! Who did you get swapped with after college?" You heard from behind the bar. Breaking your eye contact with Spencer you turn to see your college best friend.

"Alice! Oh my goodness it's been forever! How have I never seen you here?" You said overjoyed. Taking your mind off the whole Aaron Hotchner thing. "Oh you remember Spencer right?" You say grabbing him from his seat.

"O-oh hi s-Spencer" Alice said. Clearly flustered. "How have yall been. I haven't seen you in years Lex!" "Well I was in italy for a few! I'm actually just here to see Spence then I'm leaving !" You say as she gave you a judging look "lexie I just saw the way you looked at that man. You aren't just here for Spencer ..." Spencer looked at you then walked away and you buried your face in your hands.

After chatting to Alice and saying goodbye you got back to the team who were looking at you strangely.
You had to break the silence "uh so that was my college friend Alice! She used to be in love with Spencer" you said looking at Spencer who wouldn't meet your eyes. "I say you give it a shot pretty boy" Morgan says nudging him slightly. "Absolutely not" Spencer said.

Hotch went to the bathroom so the team started staring at you. "Today wasn't the first time you met was it?" Dave said. "We technically met last night but he just saved me from a perv then asked for my number" you said looking at Spencer "Spence, what's up. You're not yourself."

"Of course in not myself Alexandria. You just made out with my boss in front of me. God sometimes I wish you weren't the whore of the family" he says picking up his keys and standing from the table. "Goodnight team, don't try to follow me Alexandria"

You sank into your seat, trying your best to hide your feelings but at a table full of profilers that's extremely difficult. "Excuse me." You said before rushing to the bathroom. Closing the door you felt the air burning your lungs and your eyes started to sting. You let out a loud sob before covering your mouth with your hand trying to silence yourself.

"Alex?" It was Emily's voice. She was comforting, she was kind. "Yeah" you say trying your best to sound okay. Emily sat with you on the bathroom floor until you felt better. "You are not a whore you know" she said while stroking your hair "I don't Know em. I've had two men try to grope me in the past 48 hours and the guy who saved me from both of those men just had his tongue down my throat but it felt like the most natural thing" you say sobbing

"What do I do em?" You say "I cant loose Spencer again. I lost him once and it broke me" Emily doesn't say anything. She just pulls you closer to her and you choke out another sob. "I think we should get you home Lex" she says getting you to stand up.

You walk over to the team to get your bag trying to keep yourself composed at the sight of Spencer's empty chair. "Thank you for having me. It has been an honour to work with all of you. Now I need to get myself home. I hope I will see you all soon." You say before turning and leaving.

Once you make it home you text Hotch telling him how much you enjoyed tonight ,Saying you should do it again some time, then you decided against texting Spencer, choosing to have that conversation in person.

You peel your work clothes off  and step into the shower. It's on the second hottest setting and you can feel your skin boiling but you still felt unclean. You step out of the shower before putting on your silk blue pyjamas with lace details.

You were about to get into bed before you hear a knock at the door. You get up and look through the peephole.

"What are you doing here"