Ámame azúcar

El día que lo conocí

The title translates into "The Day I Met Him"

atychiphobia (noun)

fear of failure ; fear of not being good enough

Benji hated his mom. She was an idiot. Wait. Too fast? let's rewind.

--Enter mc- Benji- 16, so gay he can't think straight, hates his mom.

--Enter Benji's mother - Helen, 45, a literal demon, homophobic

When Benji was 7, his father came out as gay. His mom wasn't even sad- she never loved her husband, and she probably didn't love Benji either. She filed for divorce. She didn't let his dad take custody of him, claiming that a mother was crucial for a child's growth and that his dad was even abusive. Benji tried to interfere, to tell the court he wanted to go with his father. But his mother wouldn't let him. She was toxic, and even at 7, Benji realized that. In the end, his mother had full custody and his dad could only visit twice a month. His mother was a mess, he realized. His dad was her anchor, keeping her wild soul grounded, and now that he was gone, there was nothing holding her back. She partied and drank and completely ignored her son. Benji, at the tender age of 7, learned how to cook and clean up after his mother and pay bills- all the things a child should never have to do.

2 months after the divorce, his mother walked in with a strange man, telling Benji that he was going to be his new dad. Benji didn't know how to feel about this. A new dad? Was his life going to get worse?

Thankfully, it didn't. His mother had an anchor again, and he didn't have to do the chores anymore and he could properly attend school. His new dad was a kind, sweet man with a pretty face. Benji's mom acted like a completely different person around his new dad. Benji realized she was putting on an act. She was lying to his stepdad, making him think she was perfect mother and a perfect woman.

Benji wanted to tell his stepdad everything about her, but what if it got worse? What if his stepdad left, and his mother went back to a wild party girl? Benji couldn't handle her again, so he became selfish. He pretended to be part of their perfect little family, pleasing his mother beyond imagination. He got perfect scores, he was an amazing athlete, he had so many friends, he had girls all over him, and yet he was all alone. Because nobody knew the secrets he hid. Nobody knew that he was just as gay as his father was. Nobody knew the real Benji

Despite all of that, everything was going well for Benji. If he kept up his grades, he would get a good scholarship and he'd get out of the hellhole he called home. He would be free again. But fate had other ideas.

On Benji's 15th birthday, his mother caught his stepdad and his biological dad making out. They both have been in love since Benji was eleven. Out of fear that his mom wouldn't let them see him, they kept their love a secret. And now that the secret was out, his mom went batshit crazy again.

She divorced her second husband, still managed to achieve full custody of Benji even when pitted against two of his previous legal guardians, and became the wild party girl again.

Benji's grades dropped, and without the proper, healthy care he got from his stepdad, he became a sickly boy. He was no longer the center of attention, and by the time he was 16, he was just a shell of the person he used to be, no longer the bright, happy boy, but just a cold, empty vessel.

And his routine, hollow existence was about to be rewritten.

Benji's life was going to be thrown upside down, and nothing would ever be the same again.

Because 3 days after his 16th birthday, his teachers asked him to stay back, and told him he would be getting a tutor, as his grades were dropping below what was acceptable. Shocked, but grateful, Benji agreed. If only he knew the total roller coaster ride he was in for.

2 hours later, at a library, as he was waiting on the tutor, who was supposed to meet him there, Benji felt someone standing behind him.

--Enter love interest- Stefan- also 16, closeted gay, simps for Benji

He stood up and turned, and was greeted with the most beautiful set of brown eyes he'd ever seen, set in the face of a 16 year old boy wearing a band tee with ripped jeans.

A strange feeling settled in the pit of Benji's stomach. He liked it. He liked the boy's face. He was handsome. He could feel the blood rushing to his face as the boy gave him a dazzling smile, bright enough to the light the entire world. He quickly tilted his face downwards in an attempt to make sure the boy couldn't see the red on his face.

"I'm Stefan, your tutor." The boy stated, his godly features rippling with an emotion Benji    couldn't place.

"I'm Benji" Benji told him shyly

"I know" the boy replied, making the blush on Benji's cheeks darken.

If only Benji had known what the band-tee loving boy in front of him would mean to him in the future. If only he had known all the things this boy would make him feel. If only he had known all the love he would feel for this man.

 But even if he didn't know that he was staring at the man he would love for the rest of his life, Benji could still feel something change within him.

"That was the day everything changed.

Because that was the day I met him."