"𝕋𝕌𝕋𝕆ℝ" ʲᵒⁿᵍˢᵉᵒⁿᵍ

마지막 (last)

— art's.

tahimik akong nakaupo at nag hihintay na tawagin ang mga passengers papuntang us. i turned off my phone after ko ipost yung picture sa twitter. ngumisi ako, at binuksan yung food na hinanda ni mom kanina bago ako umalis.

nakapag decide na ako, final na. oo, final na yung desisyon ko sa kung anong gusto kong mangyari samin ni jay, sa relationship namin.

i just sighed, trying to calm myself down. at iniiwasang isipin muna yung mga bagay na 'yon.

pinagpatuloy ko lang ang pagkain, saka kinuha yung ipad and earphone ko para makinig ng music. chill lang, ganon ba.

sinuot ko yung earphone ko, and chose a relaxing song. hindi pa man nag start yung music, nang marinig ko ang announcement.

"artemis? art!" wait.. is this—

"this is jay. please, i know you're still there inside. answer my call, artemis. tell me where you are right now. please!" shuta, boses nga ni jongseong yung naririnig ko!

tumayo ako agad, wala nang palag.

i quickly run, para pumunta sa announcement room. or kung saan man nanggaling yung boses ni jay na 'yon.

i still have 30 minutes.

may nag turo naman agad sakin ng way kung saan ko pwedeng mahanap si jay.

and there, hindi naman ako nabigo. i saw jay, silently sitting beside the announcement room's door.

"jay!" hindi ako nag dalawang isip at sumigaw. mabilis inangat ni jay ang ulo niya para tumingin sa direksyon ko after he heard my voice.

jay quickly stood up, at mabilis na tumakbo papunta sa pwesto ko.

mangiyak ngiyak ang mga mata niya bago yumakap sakin ng mahigpit.

i hugged him back.

"aalis ka talaga nang ganon lang? are you for real, dummy?" i felt na he's really crying. i tried to look at him pero hindi niya hinayaang makawala ako sa yakap niya.

"jay, hindi—"

"will you stop saying that things won't work dahil lang sa magkakalayo tayo?" mahinahon ang boses niya. pero bakas dito ang lungkot, na nasasaktan ko siya.

nakokonsensya na ako.

"i can. we can." hindi ako sumagot.

jay looked at me. uminit naman agad ang mata ko nang makitang umiiyak si jay, for the first time.

he's crying.. no

"i'll go with you, love." he tightly held my hands.

"i'll go wherever you go. anywhere. i'll be with you." look at him and his decisions. talaga nga namang bagay kami.

umiling iling ako.

"jay, hindi nga kasi—"

"okay, go. reach your dream for yourself." he stopped. 

"but while you're busy reaching for it, i'll be with you. i promise to be with you every step of the way, love." what did i do to deserve this man? lord, niligtas ko ba ang world nung past life ko? huhuhuhu

"so please, still choose me. still choose us. kasi ako? i will never ever hesitate to choose you. us. always."

"you're my whole lifetime, artemis." jay pulled me again for a hug. basa narin ang mga pisngi ko dahil sa luha.

i smiled, at tumingin ulit kay jay.

i kissed his both cheeks, na kanina pa basa dala ng luha. tapos ngumiti ako ulit sa kanya.

"what i'm trying to say is, hindi naman ako magtatagal sa massachusetts. required kasi ayusin yung mga requirements personally kaya need kong pumunta and mag stay dun for a week." tinitigan lang ako ni jay nang ilang saglit. trying to process those words.

ngumisi ako, at hinimas himas ang pisngi niyang hindi na masyadong basa.

"and sa pagbalik ko, aayusin ko yung satin. because i realized na tama ka, tama kayo. i can always choose both, without leaving you behind."

"someone made me realized na, it's better to take the risk, make the right decision, without having a sad and regretful heart after." special thanks to my three idiot eggs.

"kaya you don't have to come with me, dahil kahit nandito ka at nandun ako, and even though we're physically not together, our hearts will still bring us closer."

niyakap ko ulit si jay ng mahigpit, at sakto tinatawag na yung mga passengers papuntang usa.

tinignan ko siya, mata sa mata.

"i'll see you after a week, love."

muling tumulo ang luha ni jay, and we both smiled at each other. hindi ko talaga kaya na nakikita siyang ganto ng dahil sakin. kaya i gave his cheeks kisses again.

finally, jongseong is smiling again.

he gave me soft kiss sa forehead ko, bago ulit ngumiti.

"i'll wait for you love, always." bulong ni jay, sa pagitan ng mahigpit na yakap naming dalawa.

never akong tinuruan ni jay maging mag isa, dahil sa bawat araw na tinatahak ko, kasama ko siya.

i chose my dream over him. and realized that he was the real dream. not just a simple fantasy, but a dream that is a huge part of who i am and what i believe in. so my heart ended up choosing to pursue that goal, along with my dream come true.

the end. ♡