Sheep Amongst Wolves

Chapter 12

Cordelia ached as you left her side, seeing and hearing Karen's claws be pulled from your shirt as you left the office. Her heart thudded, wondering if she offended you in any way or if you were completely stepping aside. Her ache wasn't the sexual kind, it was the kind where you have a warm weighted blanket pulled away from you, exposed to the cold floating world with no anchor to keep you grounded to reality. You were her weighted blanket, her anchor, the one thing she needed to keep herself from drifting off into the sea, she understood that now. She felt as though she was floating into nothingness once more, letting Karen jump to the floor and linger wherever she chose. She understood what she had to do. I need to make a move.

Cordelia poked her head into your room, seeing you laying down on your side. You were laying beside Dot, the feline on her back and staring at the ceiling. She could hear you whispering to the calico molly, her paw on your finger as though she was holding your hand. What are you telling her. Cordelia hid as she saw you look over slightly, doing her best to listen as carefully as possible to your quiet whispers.

"I love her dearly, but I need to be the bigger person and leave her with Hank. As much as it hurts, it's for the best... Thanks for listening to me, Dot." Cordelia could hear you both sniffle, then the sound of sheets moving. Poking her head in again to get a peak, she saw you holding the calico cat close as you run circles on her belly with your fingers. "(Y/N)." Cordelia whispered. "I don't want to sleep alone, can I sleep in your room, or can you sleep in mine?" She asked, seeing you look up. Please say yes. "Let me grab my pillows and blanket." You gave Dot a kiss between her ears and grabbed what you needed.

Cordelia helped you set up your spot on the floor, she had insisted that you sleep in her bed, but no matter how much she pushed you said no. She laid down in bed, curling up. It was another lonely night in her bed, not even Hank came to sleep beside her. Just as her eyes began to close, she felt something wriggle under her arm. She glanced down, eyes beginning to close. Bette and Dot had gotten under her arm, Ven sleeping beside you. Sleep flooded over Cordelia like a storming ocean, crashing and flinging her into the dark depths with no way to find her way to the surface no matter how much she clawed for the sky.

Her dreams were shrouded in darkness, salt filling her lungs as she struggled and thrashed in the air. She was floating again, reaching for your hand to anchor her to the warm dry sand of the beach. However, as she reached out, she was just dragged deeper. Looking at the hand around her ankle, she saw Hank. No, take me to the surface with you, (Y/N)! Anchor me to you! She felt your fingers brush against her wrist, air escaping her lungs as she screamed for you. Please. The dark blue sea around her, no fish no life, then she felt your hand grab her tightly. She kicked and tried to swim up as much as possible, water flooding her lungs and dissolving the salt. Then, air. You.

Cordelia clung to you as tightly as possible, fearing that you'd slip through her fingers like sand. Your warmth surrounded her, wet hair clinging to her face as she looked up, water draining out her mouth. You had that warm gaze that made her feel safe, your arms keeping her anchored to you. The dark cold water that clung to her shivering form soon dripped away, leaving her dry and warm in your embrace. I love you, I want you. Your warm loving gaze drew Cordelia in, her lips brushing against yours slightly. I choose you.

Cordelia woke up to the sound of her alarm, feeling a pair of arms around her. She stretched her neck as much as she could, looking over the edge of the bed. You weren't there, but as she looked back, you were holding her. You were a sheep in the den of a wolf, and yet you welcomed the possibility of being consumed. Consumed by her affection and your emotions. She smiled, a couple tears running down her cheeks. She could still feel the water clinging to her body, a reminder of what to do. I choose you. She slipped her ring off, placing it on her nightstand. She couldn't continue on trying to make it work with Hank, couldn't keep trying for a baby that didn't want to be a product of their relationship, couldn't keep throwing wood on an extinguished fire. However, Cordelia understood one thing.

I want to be with you.