Crusted Away

So I came back to life...for nothing?

The memory of Dr Morante's smile was one Freya cherished. His face looked so alight, a facial expression which he had found after many years. His eyes sparkled so brightly, that he was almost not even recognisable. Freya looked around at the room, there was too much happiness that her mention of Carter had toned down the atmosphere of the room, and Freya recognised it.

"Where's Carter? I really wanted to tell him something now that I've recovered!"

Mrs Murphy's upright face suddenly went from upright to down and stared at Freya's hazel eyes. Freya looked back, she knew something happened and she wouldn't be happy about it. The gaze of Dr Morante's eyes also changed to the tree outside the window. A maple tree.

"O-oh! He went on a business trip with his father!" Freya could see the hesitation in her voice. She knew when her mother lied, but she never delved further into the details. 

"Ah, I see..." Mrs Murphy quickly caught grasp of her red phone on the table and pressed some numbers. Freya was looking at the window, the green leaves appealing to her vision. Ms Murphy had stood up from her chair and went to the other room, to talk about........matters with Ms Wilson. Of course, in only a matter of minutes, Miss Wilson's flashing blonde hair had shone at the doorway. Why wouldn't Miss Wilson want to see how his son's lover was doing? Especially when she was the only memory of him left?

Freya had seen her mumble some words to Ms Murphy before she had come inside with a solemn face, softened at the sight of Freya, sitting well on her hospital bed. Can she at the very least not look at her with innocent eyes, when it was because of Freya her son was not by her side? She hated the feeling that she had to be polite to her and act as nothing had happened, and that everything is well and good.

"How are you, Freya?" Her smile was so infectious that it hid all of the gore inside of her. Oh, how much she wanted Freya to know what happened and experience the pain that Carter felt. That would be cruel though, and she had to think of Freya's perspective as well, completely oblivious. 

"I'm fine Miss Wilson! How are you? How's Carter doing?" Why did she have to mention Carter? Out of all names, did she have to mention him? Miss Wilson tried to contain her tears from falling. Her eyes were beginning to sack downwards and it was evident that something truly bad had occurred. 

"What's wrong Miss Wilson?" Freya looked with eyes of concern.

"Oh, it's just that.....Carter had got really sick where he went! I don't even know where he went! He never told me he would go....."

"Don't worry! Carter is really strong and he would never die!" Ha! His weakness is you and he's strong? 

"Now, give me my phone. If I give him a call, he'll definitely pick up! He never misses any of my calls. Never!"

Ms Murphy looked over to Miss Wilson, knowing how she would react to this, but she signed to Miss Wilson to remain calm and not to say anything yet. Maybe....maybe never tell her anything, that would be the best solution. 

Freya took the phone from her mother's hands and started scrolling through her contacts until she found Carter's name in bold writing. She pressed the name and waited. A wait that seemed to be an eternity, yet the boy never picked up. Miss Wilson clenched her hands beside her waist.

"Miss Wilson, why isn't he picking up?"

The lava inside her had come to the brim, she was ready to explode now.

"Hahahahaha!"

Freya looked in disbelief, as her laughter didn't fit the scenario. It was filled with deep agony.

"You know why he's not picking up? You know why he's not here? Because he's not here! He's dead!" Miss Wilson covered her mouth after uttering the taboo word, a word that would only make Freya's life turn upside down. Freya looked at her pillow sheets, she could tell by the way Miss Wilson looked at her, it was her fault. Hah! Who would've thought that Freya would be the protagonist when the only thing she did had killed her partner lead?

"He killed himself by that tree." Dr Morante spoke up after an eternity.

Even though Freya was pale, even though she was in bad condition, her legs had suddenly gained the power to push the white blankets that lay in front of her and ran out of the door. Corridors and corridors, windows, beds. She passed through them all. She would've noticed them as they passed if she was calm. But she didn't notice them and her path was clear to her. 

A green tree had lumbered over her presence. Somewhere so beautiful and yet it underwent so much gore. She looked down at the falling of leaves. She traced over the veins with her eyes which suddenly lead her to brown bark. She bent her head as her forehead touched the rough texture of the bark. 

"Ha! You had to kill yourself like that, huh? You just had to. You had no other option. Really? You are an idiot. You're a self-centred, selfish brat. Did you ever think about what would happen next? Your mother is crying, your father is probably not coping either. And me..."

Freya paused for a while.

"Ha! I never even liked you! I played you this whole time. At least you fell for it! It's really fun-n-ny h-h-how yo-u wo-would g-give up-p on me li-ke that th-that." Her words were segmented, syllables repeating, eyes filled with tears.

"Fine! I love you! Is that what you wanted to hear? But now that you're in heaven, I can't see you listening to me. But I know you're up there, laughing at my agony, because I made you feel so much worse! Did you even think about me?" 

Freya remained there, laying her head on the weight of the tree. The weight of her despair would only scar others, so coping with this despair herself was the only solution. She felt a presence behind her but never looked at her rear. She didn't care who listened. But no living person was ever there.