Fallout 4: AR

80. Aftermath

Lost. We lost. The words echoed endlessly in my head as I slumped against MacCready. The Institute got what they were looking for. Depression and battle fatigue settled on me like a crushing tidal wave. We fought so hard, and it was all for nothing... less than nothing. We lost, and they won.

Four members of our original squad didn't survive the fight. Unfortunately, this number included Scribe Haylen, who had fallen during the mass barrage of laser fire. In the entire time I had been in the Commonwealth, this was the first time someone I knew personally had died. She was so kind, so welcoming... Tears ran down my face in an unchecked flow. In my numbed state, I barely heard the pounding of steel-encased feet heading towards us.

"How could you?!" Knight Rhys stormed up and screamed, gesticulating wildly. "How could you just let her die like that?"

"Back off, pal!" MacCready interposed himself between me and my accuser, tensed and ready to fight, despite the obvious disadvantage. "It wasn't her fault!"

"If you knew they wouldn't fire on you, why didn't you protect both of them?" Rhys yelled over MacCready's head at me, ignoring him completely. "Haylen welcomed you! She saved your life when you were dying from radiation poisoning! And you let her die!" He blocked the punch thrown at him from my enraged partner. "You wanna have a go, rat-boy?"

My grief-laced numbness burned away, replaced by a deep anger. I launched to my feet to defend MacCready, glaring at Rhys. "How dare you!" I snarled, balling my own hands into fists, tears still streaming down my cheeks. "We did everything we could. Leave us alone!"

"AT EASE, all of you!" Paladin Danse's order cracked like a whip into our melee. He strode up adding in a quieter, but no less authoritative tone, "Knight Rhys, you represent the Brotherhood of Steel. Even in grief, you are a Knight and a professional. What happened was an unfortunate consequence of battle. Ultimately, the responsibility is mine and mine alone. We do not blame our allies." His warm amber eyes were filled with regret as he ran his hand through the tangled mass of his hair.

"Yes, Paladin," was all Rhys said. At Danse's nod of dismissal, he tromped off to assist with the cleanup operations. I watched him go, relaxing my fists and letting out a sob of reaction. The emotional high was palpable, and it was almost too much for me to take on top of my own anger and grief.

MacCready was still tense, but put his arm around my shoulders and pulled me close. "What happens now?" he asked. I was grateful yet again for his incredible ability to bounce back from anything thrown at him. The man is amazing. I still need to learn how he does it.

"Now?" Danse's expression hardened. "We recoup, mourn our losses, and move on with the mission." He stood up straight, regaining his professional bearing. "Thank you for your assistance Sarge, sniper MacCready. I ask that you speak with Elder Maxson before you depart. He should be on the roof overseeing our withdrawal." With that formal acknowledgment, he turned and walked away.

I stared after him for a long moment. "He's hurting, and focusing on his mission instead of his pain. I guess everyone copes with it differently." I caught another sob before it left my throat, shoving my own grief away. Later, I can fall apart later. It hurt, though. To keep from breaking down, I instead focused on MacCready's faded laser burns. "How are you feeling? Need another stimpak?"

He shook his head, peering around at the atrium littered with bodies. "I'll be fine, Boss. Don't waste a stimpak unless we really need it. Let's see what we can grab for loot on the way out. My pack is awfully empty."

Proctor Ingram was overseeing the disposal of the remains from both sides of the battle. The fallen Brotherhood members had already been respectfully carried to the roof, presumably to be taken back to the Prydwen for postmortem arrangements. She was examining X6-88's body when we approached. "Nice job on taking out the Courser, MacCready, though did you have to completely shatter its skull?"